A never Ending Routine Called Love
by CupcakeSprinkles14
Summary: AU: I'm left with Haymitch in the rubble, wondering if Finnick's fate would one day be mine. Why not? Snow could have a really good price for the girl on fire. Except it wasn't me he chose. It wasn't me they wanted. It seems the people of the Capitol aren't very fond of fire. They'd much rather have some bread.
1. You can't do this to him

**A/N:Just for anyone wondering, I have not dumped 'Chained Hearts,' this story will be running at the same time as it. When I'm not working on 'Chained Hearts' I'll be working on this. I just had to get this idea down on paper.**

**Thank you to my beta for this story, 'bchampagne', thanks for the help, support and advice! :D**

Never Ending Routine Called Love

Chapter One  
You Can't Do This To Him

Something inside me tells me I was lying. Something tells me I'm afraid. Scared of the possibilities of loving someone, the outcomes that might come out of it; marriage, exploitation by Snow, kids. I do think I was lying, but I didn't mean to. I wasn't sure what I felt. What was going to happen to me, with the nightlock troubles, or my family. Everything made me worry so much that it just happened, I lied. Now I fear I've lost him.

I shouldn't have told Peeta it was all an act. The pain I seem to have caused him with just telling him that, seems to have hurt him so deeply that I fear it would cause even more pain if I told him I was lying to him. I've tried keeping away, being careful, watching where I'm going so I won't run into him and feel guilty. It's killing me. I miss him. I need him. I want him. I can't have him. It's not fair. I don't deserve him, and that's what keeps me away. Peeta deserves someone worthy of his love. Maybe he'll end up falling for his best friend Delly Cartwright. The thought makes my blood boil but I immediately realize it won't happen. We're the star crossed lovers of district 12, we have to stay together. Probably ending in marriage and children.

"You could do worse," Haymitch always tells me. I know this. There's thousands of possibilities for relationships and I got who has to be the sweetest, kindest, most loving boy in district 12. Maybe even in all of Panem.

What keeps me occupied when I'm trying to stop thinking about Peeta is worrying about Snow. He's going to punish me in some way. I don't know what way, but I'm worried. Will it affect Prim? I couldn't bear it if it did. My sweet little Prim punished just because I couldn't kill my 'lover.' What about Gale? My 'cousin'.Will he be hurt in the aftermath of what I've done? His family? What about Hazelle, Rory, Vick and sweet little Posy? I don't want to be resposible for anything happening to them. I won't have any control over it though.

I'm just home from the hob when I realize something's up. My mother stopped me immediately at the door, persumably to take my shoes off.

"Don't worry, I'm taking them off here," I tell her as I kick them onto the mat by the door. She lets out a strange, breathy laugh and looks at me with a somewhat fake smile on her face. "It's just snow. Did you have a nice walk?" She questions.

"Walk?" I frown. She knows I've been in the woods. Just then I notice a man standing behind her in the doorway. I know immediately by his suit and facial features that he's from the Capitol. Something's wrong. "More like skating. It's really getting slippery out there."

"Someone's here to see you," she says. She looks sickly pale, like the way she did when she was in her depression after my father died.

"I thought they weren't coming until noon," I pretend not to notice her obvious anxiety. Cinna and my prep team will be coming to help me get ready for my first 'reunion' with Peeta since the games. I've obviously seen him since then but they're staging it up so the whole Capitol can watch our 'love'. "Did Cinna come early to help me get ready?"

"No Katniss, it's-" she begins.

"This way please, Miss Everdeen," the man instructs, gesturing down the hallway.  
I give my mother a reassuring look. "Probably more instructions for the tour." The victory tour, where I must look into the eyes of the families who's children are dead, some being killed by my own arrow, and behave like I've just won a beauty pagent.

It's strange, being ushered around your own home, but then again, the Victor's Village houses don't feel that much like home anyway. The Capitol man leads me to the door of the study. "Go right in," he tells me.

As soon as I enter the room my nose is bombarded by the smell of roses and blood. A small, white haired man who seems vaguely familiar is there reading a book. He holds up a finger. "Give me a moment," he says. He then turns to face me and my heart skips a beat.

I'm staring into the snakelike eyes of President Snow.

"I think we'd make this situation a lot simpler if we agree not to lie to each other," he says. "What do you think?"

"Yes, I think that would save time," I reply, suprising myself at how steady my voice is.

"My advisors were concerned you would be difficult, but you're not planning on being difficult are you?" he asks me.

"No," I answer.

"That's what I told them. I said any girl who goes to such lengths to preserve her life isn't going to be interested in throwing it away with both hands. Then there's her family to think of. Her mother, her sister, and all those. . . cousins." I know by the way he says cousins that he knows Gale and I don't share a family tree.

"Let's sit," Snow says, gesturing to the seats. I nod and take a seat on one of the straight backed chairs in front of the big mahogany desk whereas he takes one at the back, where Prim does her homework and mother does her budgets. "I have a problem Miss Everdeen. A problem that began the moment you pulled out those poisonous berries. If the head gamemaker, Seneca Crane, had had any brains he would have blown you to dust. But he had an unfortunate sensitive streak. So here you are. Do you know where he is now?"

I nod. It's obvious Seneca Crane has been executed.

"After that there was nothing left to do but let you play out your little scenario, little love crazed schoolgirl. The capitol was very convinced. The districts though were a bit more difficult. If you could defeat the Hunger Games then what can prevent them from doing the impossible too? Say, start an uprising?" Snow asks.

My heart jumps at the word uprising. "There have been uprisings?" I ask.

"Not yet. But there will be if the course of things don't change," Snow says.

"I didn't mean to start any uprisings," I tell him.

"I believe you," he says. "It doesn't matter. Your stylist was very prophetic in his wardrobe choice. Katniss Everdeen, the girl who was on fire. You have created a spark that, if left unattended, shall create an inferno that could destroy all of Panem."

"Why don't you just kill me?" I finally blurt out.

"Publicly? That would only add to the flames."

"Arrange an accident then."

"No one would buy it. You wouldn't, if you were watching," Snow explains.

"Why not punish my family?" I ask.

"Becase, Miss Everdeen, that is too easy. Your sister is too likeable already anyway, killing her would be just like killing you. Chucking on more gasoline. Same with your mother. I'm not so sure about the cousins though. . ."

"Don't hurt them, please," I beg.

"Don't worry Katniss, that is not what I'm planning at all," Snow grins.

"Wh-what then?" I stutter.

"How's Peeta?" he suddenly asks.

"What?" I frown. What's Peeta got to do with this? "He's. . .fine."

"The love of your life," Snow muses, tapping his chin. "Ever heard of Finnick Odair?"

"Yeah, who doesn't know Finnick Odair?" I reply. A previous victor, from district four. Once again, I don't know what he's got to do with this.

"Very handsome, don't you think?" Snow questions.

"I. . .never noticed," I lie. Finnick is attractive, but I wouldn't swoon at his feet like many others do.

"Oh yes, that's right, because you're already in love," Snow grins. "With the baker's boy." I look into his snakelike eyes, trying to figure out what he's planning. His grin widens and he rests his elbows on the desk, putting his chin ontop of his clasped hands. "When a victor is considered desirable by the people of the Capitol then I think it a shame to waste those looks on just mentoring little kids every year. So Capitol citizens bid for a night with them, to do as they wish for that night."

I freeze rock solid. "You . . . sell them?"

"Makes a wonderful amount of money I must say," Snow says.

"Finnick is the most popular."

So every new woman he has on his arm every week isn't just him jumping from girl to girl, it's a new cilent every week. That's. . . just wrong.

"Finnick is the most popular," he says again. "But with two new fresh faces on the scene there's been a constant demand that has risen to at least 1,000 people now." He doesn't mean me surely? He sees my expression and smiles. "Don't worry Miss Everdeen, it's not you," he tells me.

But who does he mean then? Surely not. . .no. . .he wouldn't. . .

" though as gathered up a lot of attention through the games and after them," Snow explains. "One of the biggest fanbases in history."

I grit my teeth and scowl at him. "Peeta wouldn't stoop as low as that," I tell him as if it's obvious.

"Oh no, sweet, generous Peeta Mellark wouldn't stoop as low as something as awful as selling his body, unless the woman he loved was put under threat." Snow's eyes are practically gleaming now.

Oh no. This can't be happening. He must be joking surely.

"Does. . .he know about this?" I ask him.

"Oh yes, he's fully aware of the situation and is as willing as any, if it's going to ensure your safety," Snow grins.

"Can't you make me do it instead?" I plead.

"Oh but then it wouldn't hurt you Miss Everdeen. I want you to suffer but I think making you watch someone you love being hurt is much more painful than it happening to you. Don't you think?"

Oh my god. No, this isn't happening. I'm going to wake up any minute now. President Snow catches me pinching myself discreetly and he grins. "I'm sorry Katniss, you're not dreaming, this is real. Very real."

"You can't do this to him," I hiss at him.

"Oh but Miss. Everdeen, I can."

I have to go see Peeta. Now.

**A/N:I'd love to know what you think of this. It's going to show what happens when Katniss watches someone she loves get hurt for what she done with the nightlock berries. I hope you like it!  
Please review! I hold every single one in a special place in my heart! :)**


	2. Drowning his sorrows

**A/N:Here's chapter two! Thanks to everyone for all your support!**

**Thanks to my beta, bchampagne! Your a life saver! :)**

Chapter Two- Drowning His Sorrows

Snow doesn't stop me when I run out of the room and down the hall. I run out the door, and don't even stop when my mother calls out to me. I run next door to Peeta's house and bang on the door with my fist. "Peeta!" I shout. "Peeta open the door!" There's a shuffle inside and I hear something smash. The door swings open to reveal Peeta looking at me through squinted eyes, as if he hasn't seen daylight in days. I don't even give him a moment to react before I attack him in a hug. "I'm so, so, sorry," I cry. "He can't do this to you, we're going to find a way out, I promise!"

His arms hesitantly wrap around my back. "Katniss, no more running," he says to me. I can smell his breath from here, it reeks of alcohol. Just like Haymitch's on a bad night.

"You can't just lay down and take this!" I snap, pulling back a bit.

"I have no choice Katniss," Peeta replies. "Snow threatened to hurt you and your family."

"We'll find a way out," I insist. I get a good look at him and my heart breaks. He's still squinting at me and his eyes have dark circles under them. He's holding onto a vodka bottle tightly in his left hand. I look behind him and notice another bottle in pieces on the floor. That explains the smash. "Are you drunk?" I ask.

"No," he says defensively, his eyes cross and he loses focus for a moment. He sways to the side and I grip his arms tighter. "Ok, maybe a bit."

"Where did you get the alcohol? Ripper has a strict over eighteen policy." I state, snatching the bottle out of his grasp.

"Told her I was getting it for Haymitch," he replies. He blinks, tries to clear his vision, and shakes his head.

"You need to sit down," I instruct, guiding him to his sofa, kicking the door shut behind me, and sitting him down. "Ok, how many fingers am I holding up?" I ask him, holding three fingers up in front of his eyes.

"Uh. . .six?" He guesses, with a frown stuck on his face. I sigh and go into the kitchen to fetch him a cup of coffee, and to get the vodka bottle as far out of his reach of as possible. As the kettle boils (Peeta only seemed to have instant coffee), there's a pounding on the door.

I vaguely hear Peeta groan and I go to the door quick enough to catch him throw his head into a pillow by the arm of the sofa. I peek through the peep hole and am suprised to see Haymitch. I open the door and give him a quizzical expression. He's looking surprisingly sober. "You hear?" he asks gruffly.

"Yes," I confirm. "Snow was very keen for me to know."

"Bastard," Haymitch mutters under his breath. "Where is he?"

"He's doing what the people of the district call, 'Doing a Haymitch,'" I answer.

"Very funny," Haymitch replies, coming into house and shutting the door behind him. "So he's hammered then?"

"I wouldn't say hammered. . ." I trail off. "More like drowning his sorrows."

Haymitch is seething. I know he thinks of Peeta and I, like we're his children. This situation is something no father would take lightly.

"Who told you?" I ask him.

"Capitol newspaper." I notice the paper in his hands for the first time and frown.

"What?" I ask. The kettle suddenly whistles and I motion for him to follow me into the kitchen and start making the coffee. As I stir the coffee into the water Haymitch passes me the newspaper.

"Front page story," Haymitch explains as I examine the paper.

"'Win a night with Peeta Mellark'?" I frown as I read the headline on the front. "This is sick."

"You're telling me," Haymitch muttered, taking the newspaper back. "Where is he?"

"Face down on the sofa," I sigh, taking the mug and going into the living room. "Peeta? Haymitch is here."

"Nmmph," is all he comes out with.

"Come on, I've made you some coffee," I say, poking him in the shoulder. "You need to sober up."

"Nuh," he grumbles.

"Look kid, if you don't drink the coffee then you'll have the worst fuc king headache tomorrow. Take it from an expert," Haymitch says.

"I know you're upset about all this. I'm sorry Peeta, I really am, but we're going to find a way out," I assure him.

"You think I'm upset because they're selling me?" Peeta scoffs, turning onto his back on the sofa.

"Well, yeah," I reply, a bit confused.

"Katniss, you're in danger if I don't pull this off right. I want you to be safe. If I do it wrong, it will be my fault if you get hurt," Peeta explains, his blue eyes full of worry.  
"Peeta, you do realize he's selling you?" I ask. "As in you."

"Yes, but your the one in danger Katniss, I couldn't bear it if anything happened to you."

I wish he wouldn't say things like that. It just makes me feel more guilty. It's not the fact that Snow's selling him that bothers him, it's the fact that I'm in danger. He's just so. . . pure. I know that Snow knows this, which is why he has chosen something like this. This is the complete opposite of everything Peeta is, as a punishment for what I've done.

"Here, drink the coffee," is all I can think of to say. I hand him the cup and he takes a small sip.

"Look boy, I know this is probably hard, but if you don't go along with this then we all could be in trouble," Haymitch says.

"You think I don't know that?" Peeta scoffs. "Course I'm going to do it. For Katniss."

"You don't have to Peeta," I say. "We can find a way out."

"Katniss, he threatened Prim. Your mother, Gale and his family. We can't run from this," Peeta says.

Oh, there's something I can't argue with. I want to ensure Gale and my family's safety. But I can't let this happen to Peeta. It just can't happen. Ok, maybe we can escape, like Gale suggested before the games. We could take both our families, Peeta and Haymitch into the woods behind the fence. There's a possibility we'd make it.

Even when drunk, Peeta can read my thoughts really well.

"We can't escape Katniss and you know it. What's the point in trying? The whole point of the fact I've chosen to do this is to protect you and your family. Gale's too I guess. If we go out into that forest and end up starving to death, it would defeat the whole purpose," he reasons.

He's right. Of course he's right. He's always right. There must be another way to stop this.

"There must be another way," I say to Haymitch, voicing my thoughts. He shrugs sadly and rubs the bridge of his nose. I sit on the sofa beside Peeta and wrap my arm round his shoulders. "We're going to get you out of this."

"Katniss, you and I are being taken to the Capitol this evening," Peeta sighs, drinking the rest of the coffee and putting the mug on the floor.

"Why?" I frown. The Victory Tour begins today, we're going to district eleven tomorrow. Why would we go to the Capitol?

"Here Katniss," Haymitch sighs, handing me the paper. I look on the front page again. Right, there's the headline, a photo still of Peeta the way he looked on the chariot rides, (they seemed to have cut me out) a small article below it explaining it. "Hold on, bidding starts tonight?" I exclaim.

"Tonight," Peeta groans, throwing his head back into the pillow.

"Seems like Snow wanted to make sure you couldn't find a way out," Haymitch muses. "They'll bring you to district eleven tomorrow morning."

"Bu-but, we. . .we. . ." I trail off. "There's needs to be a way out! There just has to be!"

"Sorry Katniss," Peeta mumbles.

"Wha. . .?" I still can't think of anything to say.

"I'm sorry kid," Haymitch sighs.

"I'm going to stick with you through this," I declare, "I promise."

The telephone starts ringing and Haymitch goes to answer it. When he returns to the room he says, "Katniss your prep time's here."

"I don't wanna leave," I mumble.

"You're going to have to, if we want to keep up appearances," Haymitch says. "Don't worry, I'll make sure the boy sobers up."

"I am here you know," Peeta grumbles.

Haymitch pulls me off the sofa and steers me to the door. "I'll look after him," he murmurs into my ear as he ushers me outside. He shuts the door behind me as soon as I'm out of the doorway.

Octavia, Flavius and Venia attack me in hugs as soon as I'm through my own doorway. "Katniss!" They squeal. "We've missed you so much!" I just nod and agree with them since I'm in such a glum mood. They prep me as usual and Cinna comes and wraps me up in some designer winter clothes.

Once the team are out of the room he studies my face carefully. "Katniss are you OK?" he asks me.

"What?" I ask. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" he asks.

"Yes," I reply, not sounding one bit convincing. Cinna doesn't look convinced either but doesn't push it.

Effie soon appears and briefs me on what I'm expected to do once I'm outside. I just nod over and over again, as if it's some new mantra. It's no exaggeration when I say she pushes me outside.

It started to snow again, so I have to squint a bit before I see Peeta come out of his house too. A grin spreads across my face as I see him and I start running.

I attack him in a hug as soon as I reach him and hold on for dear life. As if holding onto him will keep him safe from Snow and the Capitol. He still hasn't gotten used to his new leg yet so he slips on a piece of ice and we both fall in a heap onto the ground. We both laugh and I give him a quick kiss, earning some 'aww that's so cute' from the people filming us. I want to stay there forever, freezing the moment where we're both just happy, and not worrying about anything.

Once I help him back up to his feet, we go to the train station and pose for a few more photos before letting out a sigh of relief once the train door slides shut. Effie bustles off to do whatever Effie does, and leaves Haymitch, Peeta and I standing the hallway in silence.

After about five mintues Haymitch blows a raspberry and pats Peeta on the back and places a hand on my shoulder. "OK kids, I need a drink. You better get some sleep before tonight." He says, heading off down the hall.

"You okay?" I ask as we head down to our rooms.

"Well I'm not as hammered anymore," Peeta shrugs.

"You know that's not what I mean," I say softly.

"I know," Peeta sighs. "I'm fine, really Katniss, I'm OK."

He's lying. I can see it in his eyes. I don't push it though. I know what it feels like to not want to share your thoughts, with people trying to prod it out of you.

"Maybe we should listen to Haymitch and get some rest," Peeta suggests.

"Hmmm, yeah," I reply.

"Katniss, I'm fine, I promise," he assures me, before heading off to his room.

I stay standing in the same spot for another half hour before heading off to my room and falling into a restless sleep.

**A/N:Hope you liked it! Please review! Reviews make my day! :)**


	3. Broken

**A/N: Oh my goodness I'm so sorry this took me so long but things have been so crazy lately what with christmas, my cousin's boyfriend's evil ex having a baby, breaking my leg **_**and **_**working on **_**Chained Hearts!**_

**Sorry for mistakes, I didn't give my beta a chance to look it over because I wanted to get this out to you guys ASAP :D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own **_**The Hunger Games**_** or it's characters and ideas. I also do not own Suzanne Collins' brain and imagination. *Sigh***

Chapter Three-Broken

I'm roused later on by Haymitch. "Katniss," he hisses. "It's time." He pulls the cover off my body and the cold air makes me jump into a sitting position. "Already?" I whine.

"You'd be suprised how fast Snow can get these trains to go when he wants to," Haymitch replies tiredly.

"What time is it?" I ask as I clambour out of bed and search for something decent to wear.

"Eight o'clock," he replies, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Is Peeta up?" I ask as I pull on a sweater.

"He's away on Katniss," Haymitch answers. "Effie took him off the train about an hour ago."

"What?!" I snap as I pull my skirt up. "I want to be with him through every second of this!"

"Katniss, I'm sorry, whether you like it or not, someone's buying Peeta for the night and you can't be with him then. He also doesn't want you there," Haymitch explains.

"Why not?" I frown, sitting down beside him.

"Katniss, there isn't much dignity in something like this. And he knows what your temper's like. If you went with him then it's very likely you'd rip their faces off," Haymitch explains to me.

"So when you say it's time you mean. . . ?"

"For the bidding to be aired on the television. . .if you want to watch it."

I bite my lip. Should I watch it? Would he want me to watch it? I really want to know what Capitol slut will buy him though.

"Yes, I'll watch it," I decide.

"Are you sure?" Haymitch asks.

"Yes," I confirm. "I want to see."

"Ok, but this is on your own head."

I nod and follow him into the train compartment where the television sits. I curl up onto the sofa and Haymitch sits beside me and pats my knee. "You ready kiddo?"

"Yeah, just turn it on."

Haymitch nods and flicks the t.v on. I know immediately this is going to get me riled up. First of all, it's set up like an interview with Caeser, who's presenting the whole thing, and secondly there's about twice the crowd there was for the tribute interviews.

"Oh god," I mumble as Caeser strides on stage with his signature grin on his face.

"You postive about watching this?" Haymitch checks.

"Yes," I try to say firmly but my voice wavers.

Caeser greets the crowd and warms them up with a couple of jokes then explains the system for 'the folks at home'. This only airs in the Capitol. The system is that they'll call for a first bid and then escalate it from then. I thought they would have brought Peeta onto the stage during the bidding but there's just a giant background image of him behind Caeser. Apparently he's getting brought out when there's a winning bidder.

Haymitch and I both gape when the first bid is $12,500. More people start joining in and the numbers get so big that I start to feel sick. Snow wasn't kidding when he said it makes a lot of money. I feel a headache coming on and I rub my eyes for a moment.

"Want me to switch it off?" Haymitch asks, waving the remote in the air.

"No, I need to see who wins it," I say as assertively as I can muster.

"Ok, if your sure."

I'm not sure how long the bidding lasts as the numbers start to run into each other as time passes. These people in the Capitol must each own a money tree in their backyard because the bidding ends at $1,500,999! My jaw pretty much dropped to the floor. These people do realize that he's in a 'relationship' with me right?

But the person who wins is what makes me feel like I'm going to pass out. My hands grip the arm of the sofa tightly as I look at them. It's a woman thank god. Some men who I can only assume are gay were bidding too. She's probably one of the  
more. . .normal looking people of the Capitol. She has altered herself though. Her lips are way too plump to be nautral and her breasts are a bit bigger than somone of her stature would be born with. Her blonde hair and nothing too exterme altered is what makes her seemily normal.

"Eyes front Haymitch," I mumble as he gapes at the woman, his mouth hanging open big enough to catch flies.

I glare at the screen as Caeser brings her up on stage.

"Congratulations!" Caeser cheers. "What's your name sweetheart?"

"Natalie," the girl grins confidently. "Natalie Stars." I roll my eyes at the name.

"So Natalie, would you like us to get Mr. Mellark out here?" Caeaser asks.

"Yes please," Natalie grins. Her smile scares me. There's a hint of something in there that I can't make out.

"God he's gotten a whore," Haymitch mutters.

"How can you tell?" I ask.

"Her body, face, that _grin_, everything just screams whore."

"Oh. . ."

When Peeta comes out, I'm suprised. He seems so at ease as he strolls onto the stage and joins Caeser and. . .urgh. . .Natalie. His prep team seem to have gotten to him again once he arrived at the capitol as well as when they prepped him for our reunion. Natalie grins and claps while jumping up and down on the spot like she's won a car on a gameshow, not an actual person.

"Welcome Peeta!" Caeser grins. "So, what do you think of Natalie here?"

"Pleased to meet you Natalie," Peeta smiles, holding his hand out for a shake. Natalie shakes his outheld hand, her smile never faltering. My blood is boiliing now and I just want to chuck the remote at the t.v screen.

"Why's he so at ease?" I ask, more to the t.v than to Haymitch.

"Probably wants to give Snow no room for complaint," Haymitch simply replies.

"This is my fault," I mumble.

"Don't start that again," Haymitch grumbles. "He wouldn't want you saying that would he?"

"No," I reply sadly.

"Right now, the best you can do is help him in any way you can," Haymitch continues. "And I think, at the moment, the thing he'll need the most is comfort." With that, he switched the t.v off. "Don't watch anymore. It can't be good for your mental state. Get some sleep."

"I'm just after sleeping!" I protest.

"Katniss, you need to rest."

"Fine," I grumble, standing up and going back to my room.

It seems like moments later when I'm woken up by a knocking on my door. I look at the clock by my bed and note that it's 6:00am. I swing the covers off my bed and realize I went to bed in the clothes I was wearing to watch the bidding in. I rub my eyes and pull the door open, expecting to see Haymitch.

But it's not Haymitch.

It's Peeta.

I gape for a moment at the sight of him. His hair is a complete mess, sticking up at all angles and sticking in his eyes more than usual. His clothes are all crumpled and his shirt is untucked at one side and the first three buttons undone. He's holding his jacket in his right hand and looks completely beaten down. The normally lively blue eyes looking broken and tired.

"Peeta, are you Ok?"

"Katniss. . .I don't really know at the moment," he replies quietly.

We don't say another word but I wrap my arms around him anyway. "It's all going to be alright," I whisper in his ear. "I promise."

~xXx~

I made him lie down immediately. He looked so tired I couldn't bear seeing him in pain so much. He asked if I would stay with him, and I have.

I've been in my room with him for an hour now while he sleeps. The train is heading back to District 11 now and we'll be there by noon, judging by the speed we're going at. I have his head in my lap and I seem to have developed a habit of playing with his hair. He always said he liked my hair in it's braid and when we're in front of the cameras in an intimate moment he'd take it in his hands and play with the little bit of hair at the end. I never understood the fascination but I think I get it now. I can't stop my fingers weaving through the golden locks of silken hair as he lightly snoozes.

I didn't make him tell me about his night with Natalie before I sent him to sleep. I still don't know if he wants to talk about it. I'm not sure I want to hear it. There are some questions I do want answered though. Like, how can the people of the Capitol not question our relationship if Peeta is being sold to people every other night? They can't be that oblvious can they?

Peeta doesn't wake up until 9:30 which makes me wonder if he got any sleep at all last night.

Even if I didn't want to see the pain he's in, seeing those crystal blue eyes again gives me a wave of assureance I never knew I needed.

"You OK?" I ask as soon as he's aware of his surroundings again.

"Probably as much as I can be," He replies, looking right up at me.

"You want to talk about it?" I ask. "Don't feel compelled to, I just heard it sometimes helps."

His eyes flutter closed again momentarily before he sighs and opens them again. "I think I'll keep it to myself for a while."

"OK," I reply softly, only realizing now that I haven't stopped playing with his hair. You'd think I'd stop now that he's awake but I can't bring myself to do it.

Odd.

There's a knock at the door and Effie's voice rings out, "Up, Up, Up! It's a big, big, big day!"

Peeta sits up right, his hair falling back into place over his eyes while other parts still stay sticking up. "My prep team are going to have a stroke when they see me," he mutters, looking at himself in the mirror across the way and trying to scruff his hair back into place.

"It's not that bad," I reason. "You could go for the ruggad look."

Peeta laughs and takes one final attempt at fixing his hair before giving up. He sighs and gets up to go back to his room.

"Peeta?" I call once he's at the door.

"Yeah?" He asks, turning round with his hand on the doorknob.

"Are you going to be OK?"

He looks at me sadly. "I'll do my best."

And with that, he's gone.

**A/N: Once again, so sorry this took so long, it was completely my fault. And maybe fate's fault too . . .**

**Please R&R! :D**


	4. Scary Odds

**A/N: Hey everybody! I'm back! Thanks to all my amazing reviewers!**

**To the guest reviewer who I sadly couldn't reply to: Very valid points you have pointed out. I hope this chapter helps clear that problem up a bit and make it a bit more to your liking! Enjoy! ^_^**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games. If only!**

Chapter Four- Scary Odds

We're all sitting in the dining car, eating breakfast, while Effie runs the plan for the tour over with us for the thousandth time. She wants to drill it through us until we know it in our sleep.

It amazes me how Peeta can revert from being broken and hurt to the normal, easygoing guy I know and love. Haymitch does the same. Only he doesn't have to try too hard to be drunk, pesimistic and sullen. The only person in this cart who is being their normal self without trying is Effie. Probably because she doesn't know what happened last night. Either she doesn't read the newspaper, watch t.v, or she's been too busy working on this plan for District 11 that she hasn't noticed what's been going on, I don't know.

To prove this assumption, her first question to Peeta after explaining the plan for 11 is what challenges all our acting skills.

"Peeta dear," she says. "Is that a . . . love bite?"

I frown at Effie for a moment, wondering what's she's talking about, before my eyes zone into a small bruise on the side of Peeta's neck. It looks sore and I wince at the thought of how he got it.

Peeta, always quick to react, slaps his hand over the bite and chuckles nervously. "What? No, it's just a bruise," he says airly.

Effie frowns and puts her glass of orange juice down. "How can you get a bruise on your neck sweetie?" she asks. "Wouldn't your prep team have covered it up when they got you ready for your interview with Caeser last night?"

Oh, so she thought it was an _interview._

I see Peeta struggling for an answer and I blurt out the first thing that comes into my head. "I gave him it!" I declare.

Effie's eyebrows shoot to her hairline and Peeta frowns at me in confusion. "You gave him the bruise?"

"I . . . uh . . . yeah," I say, taking a bite out of my roll, acting like it's no big deal.

"How?" Effie demands.

This time Haymitch steps in. "Probably sucking face last night or something," he mutters. I know he knows were the bite came from, but I have to admit, he's a good actor.

Effie's gaze ping pongs between Peeta and I for a moment before she sighs and shakes her head. "You two be careful now. Take things slowly," she says. "Don't want any little ones running around just yet."

Peeta chokes on his hot chocolate and my mouth hangs open.

"I think they understand about all that Miss. Trinket," Haymitch says in a high pitched mocking tone of Effie's voice while I thump Peeta's back to help him stop coughing.

Said woman glares at him. "Just making sure they know," she replies.

How can she be thinking so far ahead already? Is this what happens when the Capitol gets into your head and posions it?

"They're smart kids Effie," Haymitch says. "They know."

"I think you've been watching too much teenage pregnancy shows Effie," Peeta manages to say once he's breathing right again.

"Oh hard de har har," Effie says back.

Despite sounding impossible, there's still one person that doesn't know what's happening right now to Peeta and can still make everything so such harder. Only Effie Trinket could manage that.

~xXx~

The only part of the Victory Tour that has been eventful in any way was District 11 itself. I blabbered too much, Peeta gave away a lot of our winnings and a man got shot. It was my fault. I feel awful. I just hope Rue and Thresh's families are OK. And the rest of the District as well of course.

For the rest of the Districts we are given a script to read off of.

Since the night before 11, Peeta hasn't had to return to the Capitol for anything. It makes me think maybe it was a one off. Maybe it was a warning from Snow about not messing up. Maybe it means we can start anew.

Then we came to District 2.

There are many victors in District 2 but the main mentors for the kids going into the Games are Enobaria and Brutus, who we are taken to meet on the first day in the career district.

"Katniss, Peeta, say hello to Brutus," Effie says, pointing to the male mentor. "And Enobaria," she says, pointing to the female mentor.

"Pleased to meet you," Enobaria says, her voice curling round each word as if strangling it, her pointy teeth gleaming in the light.

Enobaria is famous for ripping a tribute's neck with her own teeth. Once she won the Capitol got them engraved in gold and made them fang sharp. I shiver when I see them when she smiles.

"Charmed," Brutus says gruffly, walking off in the oppisote direction to where we're standing.

Enobaria takes a final glance at us both, her gaze lingering on Peeta curiously for a moment, before turning round and running off in Brutus' direction.

"Not the most hospitable people," Effie sighs. "Still, what can you do? They're from District 2."

On the train that night I hear footsteps walking along the hallway by our rooms and a knocking on the door of the room next to mine. Peeta's room. We're staying the night in District 2 so the train isn't moving. I don't think much of the knocking and pull the duvet back over my head and try and fall asleep.

I wake up in the fetal position, the duvet wrapped round my body like a cocoon protecting it's caterpillar. It's still dark outside so I snuggle my head back into the pillow, trying to find some warmth and comfort again.

I'm woken up later by heavy footsteps. I throw the duvet off of me and wander over to the bedroom door. Curious to who owns the footsteps, I press my ear against the door and listen carefully. The room next mine's door is opened again and the footsteps cease as the door is shut.

My curiousity getting the better of me, I leave the room and walk down the hallway to the room next to mine-Peeta's room.

I vaguely hear shuffling behind the door and water running from a tap. I knock on the door. "Peeta?" I call softly. "Are you alright?"

There's a long pause before he replies. "Yeah, just hold on a moment."

I do as he says and wait by the door. It's mere moments later when I hear a loud bang and a swear. "Peeta? Are you alright?" I repeat. This time there's no answer. I panic and swing the door open.

The tap is running but there's no occupant by the sink. Blood is smeared across the sink itself, standing out in stark contrast to the sterile white ceramic sink. My heart pounds at the sight of the scarlet smears. My eyes follow a wet trail in the carpet that runs along to Peeta's bed. A small bout of blonde hair is just about poking out at the side of the bed facing away from me.

"Peeta?" I almost whimper. The blonde bit of hair sinks down further until I can't see it any more. I enter the room and close the door gently. I walk over and turn the tap off, not actknowledging the blood's presence at all. I tread carefully over to the other side of the bed, the way I do when I'm in the forest and trying not to scare away game. "Peeta?" I say again, coming round the edge of the bed.

My heart practically breaks in half when I see him.

Slumped against the bed, trying to hide himself, is Peeta. I recognize the disorderly clothing as similar to what they looked like the morning he came to me as we were heading to district 11. The only difference from now and that morning is that his left hand is coated in blood and covering something on his neck.

"Peeta what happened?" I cry, flinging myself to the ground beside him. He's refusing to look at me. "Let me see," I order, reaching over and trying to move his hand away from his neck. He flinches at my touch but won't let me move it. "Come on Peeta, let me see it," I say. He cranes his head away from me before relaxing his hand, letting me move it. My eyes widen at the cut adorned on his skin.

It's a bite mark.

"Oh Peeta," I whisper. "Come here." I wrap my arms round him and pull him close to me, not caring that he won't even look me in the eye. "Who did this to you?"

A faint, muffled, one worded reply is all I get back. At first I wonder if I heard him right but I'm almost positive I did. _"Enobaria."_

That bloody cougar! She's got to be . . . what? Way over ten years older than him?

"We need to get this fixed up," I say, standing up and taking his hands to pull him up too. I go into his bathroom and, not caring about Capitol cloth, rip a strip off a towel and wet it at the sink.

Peeta's sitting on the bed when I return, staring at his feet in what I can only decipher as shame. It breaks my heart.

"Right, let's see," I say, sitting beside him and looking at the wound. It looks pretty deep, not suprising with how sharp Enobaria's teeth are. "This might sting a bit." I gently dab at the bite as gently as I can, cleaning the blood away. "I'm no nurse so I'm just going to clean it and we'll ask Haymitch what to do tomorrow OK?"

No reply.

"Peeta, look at me," I demand. He ignores me. "Peeta, please look at me!" I drop the towel onto the bed and grasp both sides of his face, turning it towards me. His eyes are still looking down. "Please Peeta, there's nothing to be ashamed of, this isn't your fault." I don't know how to coax him to look at me. I always felt like he was the strong one. I never knew I'd have to do this. "Look at me please." I'm beginning to panic. "Please, I need you to look at me." I tip his chin up a bit, his eyes finally moving with the movement and meeting mine.

Hurt. That's all I can see. Hurt and shame. It squeezes my heart and I have trouble swallowing down the lump that's forming in my throat. The azure blue that I love is still there but tinged with red.

I don't speak, neither does he, I just pull him back into a hug. And I say something I never thought I'd have to say before. "If you need to cry, don't be afraid too."

"No Katniss, I need to be strong," Peeta finally says, pulling away from the hug.

"But doesn't crying help?" I whisper.

"Not in some situations Katniss. Sometimes it's a release of your emotions. Other times it paints a target on your back. If this . . . arrangment is going to be longterm then I need to be strong. And I mean strong. I can't cry everytime it happens," Peeta explains.

I can't hold back the sob any more. It forces it's way up my throat and I can't stop it. This is sick. Twisted. Perverted. If they can give him to someone as old as Enobaria what stops them from selling him to someone much older? Or even worse, selling him to a man? Nothing. That's what. Nothing stops this happening because President Snow arranged it. And when something is speically arranged by President Snow then nothing and no-one will end it but Snow himself.

"What do we do?" I ask, cursing myself when my eyes begin to blurr.

"I don't know Katniss," Peeta mumbles in reply, taking the towel and pressing it to his neck again. "All I know is that the process has changed."

"Oh?" I ask.

"Yeah. It was too public. It turns out the people in the Capitol aren't as thick as we thought," Peeta explains. "They are questioning our relationship after that was aired on television with Natalie."

I knew this was going to happen! I just knew it.

"Then what are they doing about it?" I question.

"It's being brought out as a joke. A test to show if the people of the Capitol were as devoted to the star crossed lovers of District 12 as they let on. Snow explained on live televison that he was pleased with the results of the 'test' and assured them that nothing happened between Natalie and I that night," He explains to me.

"What about those people who bidded? All those people who went and cheered?" I ask.

"Most of that crowd was paid by President Snow to act like they were bidding anyway," Peeta answered. "The ones who weren't . . ."

"What?"

"I don't know what happened them."

I know then that's it's very likely that those who weren't paid to bet or cheer are either dead or 'missing.'

"Natalie?" I ask. "What about Natalie Stars? What's happened her? She knows what happened between you and her more than anyone else would."

Peeta's gaze shifts down again. "Natalie's in the custody of the Capitol. She threatened to tell if Snow didn't meet her demands of money and privilleges. She should have known not to mess with him. I don't know what's happening her now."

Poor Natalie. Wait what? I'am feeling sorry for Natalie? The slut who stole Peeta's virginity? Well, what I think was his virginity anyway. Isn't this like justice? Getting what she deserves? No. No it's not. It's horrible to think like that. She was just another oblivious citizen of the Capitol who bounced through life carefree and who thought the world was perfect and rosey.

"How does it work now? The format I mean?" I ask, going over to the window and closing it. It's getting very chilly.

"Someone will be sent to collect me, very likely Haymitch or maybe on occasion Portia, and take me where ever the person who wants my . . . services for the night is. Either that or I'll be sent a letter or recieve a phone call beforehand."

"Much more discreet," I murmer, tears welling up in my eyes again. Why am I the one crying? I shouldn't be the one crying! This is absoloutly ridiculous! Still, once they're there I can't stop them. They spill out and trickle down my face. I try and cover them with my hands. Comforting arms envelop me and I hear Peeta shushing me. "It'll be OK Katniss," he whispers. This is just adding to the insanity of it all because I should be one comforting him! Not the other way round!

I sleep in the same room as Peeta that night. There's no distance this time. I sleep next to him, my head using his arm as a pillow, just like back in the arena.

Just before I fall asleep I feel Peeta slip out from beside me. At first I panic, thinking he's leaving, but am soon relaxed again when I hear him padding over to the window and opening it up again.

His warmth soon returns beside me and I fall asleep with one thought on my mind.

_He can't sleep without the window open._

**A/N: I never liked Enobaria and I always thought she'd be the type of person who'd be a cougar. Anyway, it was pointed out to be by said guest reviewer at the top of the chapter that I was making it too public. Which I never considered before. It makes sense. Definetly. So I changed it. No more t.v interviews and newspaper articles. Just, well, what was explained up there in the chapter.**

**Anyway, please R&R! I love to hear what you guys think.**

**Keep Calm and Keep Reading ;)**


	5. Kitty Snow

**A/N: Hello all! Yes, I have not died, went into hiding or fell down a hole and discovered Wonderland, I'am alive!**

**Sorry this took so long, a bunch of crap has been happening at home that I won't go into detail on but ta-da! Here's the next update! :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games, it's characters or ideas. If I did I would have so much power . . .**

Chapter Five- Kitty Snow

"So, tell me again, when exactly did this dog bite you?" Effie frowns as Haymitch pulls out a bandage from a giant first aid kit.

"Uh, I went out for a walk last night, to get some air you know? Since we weren't moving and all," Peeta begins to explain. "And this dog just came out of nowhere! At least it only got one bite before I got away!"

It's difficult to keep my expression of that of concern instead of astonishment for how easily these lies come to him. "Is it serious Haymitch?" I ask.

"No, not serious," Haymitch replies gruffly. "It's deep but not serious."

"Here Haymitch, let me put it on," I say, taking the bandage off him. "Tilt your head over." I order Peeta. He complies, tilting his head over to the right, exposing the now cleaned bite mark clearly. I rip the plastic off of the bandage and lightly press it down on the wound. "You'll be good as new, I promise."

Peeta chuckles and straightens his neck again. "Thank you Doctor Everdeen," he replies with a smile.

I laugh and toss the bandage wrapper at Haymitch, who snatches it before it gets close enough to him and swears under his breath about 'darn kids having no common sense.'

~xXx~

District One was hard to deal with. I personally killed Marvel and I suppose I'm responsible for Glimmer too, since it was me who dropped the tracker jacker nest on the careers, so looking into the eyes of their families was unbearable. At least I had Peeta's hand to cling onto during the whole thing.

Back on the train, Haymitch suggests Peeta proposes to me on the Capitol interview with Caesar Flickerman. I guess if we're going to convince them that we're in love and cover up the whole public Natalie Stars incident then it's the best way to go. I can tell Peeta isn't happy. I understand. I doubt this is how he had thought this would be how he'd propose to me. As some stragety.

I'm dreading going back to the Capitol. Sure, there's no angry, upset and devastated families to face in the Districts but I think the Capitol is much worse. They'll congratulate me on winning, telling me how well my aim was when I shot Marvel, how clever I was to figure out what Rue was telling me to do with the Tracker Jacker nest and how they think I performed overall in the Games.

Worst of all, they'll tell me about how tragic and romantic Peeta and I are together.

That night, on the stage before the Training Center, we bubble our way through a list of questions. Casear Flickerman, in his twinkling midnight-blue suit, his hair, eyelids and lips still dyed power blue, flawlessly guides us through the interviews. When he asks us about the future, Peeta gets down on one knee, pours out his heart and begs me to marry him. I, of course, accept. Casear is beside himself, the Capitol audience hysterical, shots of crowds around Panem show a country besotted with happiness.

President Snow himself makes a suprise visit to congratulate us. He clasps Peeta's hand and gives him an approving slap on the shoulder. He embraces me, enfolding me in the smell of blood and roses, and plants a puffy kiss on my cheek. When he pulls back, his fingers digging into my arms, his face smiling into mine, I dare raise my eyebrows. They ask what my lips can't.

_Was it enough? I've comitted my life to him! Will you stop this now? Leave him alone?_

In answer, he gives me an almost imperceptible shake of his head.

I try my best to listen to the frilly men and women of the Capitol as they compliment me on Peeta and my's victory at the after party but I always feel my mind wandering. Even though his hand is tightly held in my grip, I can't help thinking that anyone in this room could buy Peeta for the night if they have the right connections. How can Snow be so cruel? I've comitted to spending the rest of my life with Peeta and yet he still insists it isn't enough and that he will continue to sell him to teach me a lesson. Any man or woman that glances our way curiously makes me worry but I think it's more of because how I'm clinging to him like he's a magnet and I'm a piece of metal.

There's a buffet of various exotic and colourful foods and once we get away from the people fawning over us I tell Peeta I want to try everything in the room. The first table has different coloured soups in bowls on it and I take a spoonful of each and give him the rest as I need to pace myself or I'll get ill from the sheer quality of the food.

I dance with Peeta for a while. We exchange a quiet conversation, ear to ear, about how much longer we can keep this up. I honestly don't know how much longer we can do this for but we must keep going. I must think of something better that will convince Snow that I've learnt my lesson and that he no longer needs to sell Peeta.

The thought of a baby pops into my brain but I shake it away quickly.

The new Head Gamemaker for this year's Quarter Quell asks Peeta if he can steal me for a dance. Peeta good naturely hands me over, warning him not to get too attatched.

I don't want to dance with the Head Gamemaker, Plutarch Heavensbee I think his name is. His touch feels alien, his hand on mine and his other on my hip. It's not like Peeta's touch. The touch I've gotten so used to over the past few weeks.

We chit chat for a bit until Plutarch makes a joke about avoiding punch bowls since my training session last year. I don't get it at first but then I realize he must be the Gamemaker that fell into the punch bowl when I shot the apple out of the pig's mouth in my private training session for the Games.

"Oh, your the one who-" I laugh, remembering him splashing into the punch bowl in shock and horror.

"Yes," Plutarch replies, "And I'm sure your glad to know that I haven't recovered since."

I want to point out that twenty two tributes haven't recovered from dying in the arena but I swallow my anger and only say, "Good. So your the Head Gamemaker this year? That must be a great honour."

"Between you and me, there hasn't been many takers for the job," Plutarch admitts. "So much responsiblilty as to how the Games turn out."

_Yeah, because the last guy's dead._ I think. He must know about Seneca Crane. How else would he have gotten the job? "Are you planning the Quarter Quell already?" I ask.

"Oh yes, but it's been in the works for years. Arenas don't just build themselves in a day you know," Plutarch replies. "But the . . . shall we say, _flavour_ of the Games, is being determined currently. I've got a stragety meeting tonight." He steps back and takes a watch out of his pocket. Flipping it open, he looks at the time. "I must be going soon." He flips the watch so that I can see the face. "It starts at midnight."

"That's a bit late for a-" I say but something distracts me. Plutarch has run his thumb along the face of the watch and just for a moment, an image appears, as if lit by candlelight. Another mockingjay. Just like the pin on my dress. Only this one disappears.

He pockets the watch again.

"That's very pretty," I say.

"Thank you, it's one of a kind," Plutarch replies. "Oh, and if anyone asks where I've went, just tell them I've went home to bed. The stragety meetings are top secret."

"Don't worry, your secret's safe with me," I answer.

"Anyway, I'll see you next summer at the Games. Congratulations on the engagement. And good luck with your mother," Plutarch says.

"I'll be needing it," I say back.

He leans in towards me, at first I think to give me one of those silly Capitol goodbye kisses on the cheek, but when he goes further, so his mouth is inches away from my ear, I know it's not.

"Watch out for Kitty Snow," He whispers. "She has an eye on your man."

Kitty Snow? Who's Kitty Snow?

Plutarch turns his back on me and leaves without saying another word.

Worried about Peeta, I go to try and find him. It doesn't take long. I find him in no time beside the cupcake table. He's speaking to the pastry chiefs about frosting while they listen eagerly. He asks for a box of cupcakes to take back to District 12 with him to study closer at home.

The Kitty Snow comment has thrown me off. I've heard the name before. She's obviously something to do with President Snow. I try and remember where I've heard it before when an image of a youthful girl with white hair comes into my head.

My heart drops into my stomach and I hook my arm into the crook of Peeta's elbow in fear.

She's his granddaughter.

Kitty Snow is President Snow's seventeen year old granddaughter. I remember seeing her in some public broadcasts, standing behind her grandfather and beside her mother, Cornelia Snow, as the president spoke to Panem. She's older than me so I don't remember a lot of watching her on t.v but there's something about the way she used to look down the camera when they were filming that used to make my blood run cold.

Suddenly very anxious, I wish for Effie to come soon, prompt as always, telling us that we have to stay on our schedule and make it back to the train on time. The train that will take us back to District 12. Where we'll be safe. At least where I think we'll be safe . . .

When Effie does come, I'm relieved. She tells us to say our goodbyes as we have to stick to her schedule, which she has planned carefully to the last detail. It doesn't take too long to say our goodbyes and to head out of the party.

While walking down the corridor, I can't help smiling in relief. Maybe Plutarch was wrong. Maybe Kitty Snow was just another Hunger Games fan. But then Effie says something that shatters my relief. "I've got a suprise for you both," she chirps as we walk down the corridor.

I stop dead in my tracks, ultimately making Peeta tug backwards with me since my arm is still hooked in his elbow. "What suprise?" I ask.

"The President's Granddaughter wants to meet you both!" She cheers.

"Why!?" I demand.

"Because she's a fan of course!" Effie grins. "Come on, let's not keep her waiting."

My steps become so small I'm almost shuffling down the corridor towards Kitty's room. When we stop outside the door, Effie's grin widens and she knocks on the door.

A light voice says, "Come on in."

Effie tilts her head towards the door, telling us to go on in. My hand shakes as I reach for the doorknob. Peeta notices, takes my shivering hand and opens the door himself. I'm grateful. I don't want Kitty to see that I'm scared.

When we enter the room, Effie doesn't follow us. She just shuts the door behind us.

Kitty's room is mostly red. Velvet bed covers, chairs, curtains, carpets, walls, all red. The colour of blood. A shiver runs down my spine.

Kitty herself is sitting on the edge of her bed. She's exactly how I remember her from the t.v broadcasts. Her hair is pure white and falls down to her becieps. Her skin is porcelin pale, causing her blood red lips to stand out. Deep green eyes stare back me, blinking only occasionly.

After a couple of minutes of slience she speaks. "I know," she says.

I tighten my grip on Peeta's hand and try not to let my fear break through. "Know what?" I ask.

"Well, that's the question isn't it?" Kitty grins. "I know a lot. You name it, I know it."

"For example?" Peeta asks.

"Your fake love, for example," Kitty answers, her gaze flicking to him momentarily before returning to me. I know why she's staring at me. She knows I'm scared. She knows if she tries hard enough, she could break me. She knows that if she stared at Peeta then he'd just return the gaze, twice as strong as hers.

She's right. She knows a lot.

"It's not fake," I try and deny. I know there's no point but it's worth a shot.

Kitty laughs. "Sure it's not," she says sarcastically. "And yet Lover Boy over there sleeps with whoever has enough cash to flash."

Peeta stiffens beside me and I give his hand a reassuring squeeze to try and settle him. "You know nothing about that," I snap.

"Oh yes, course I don't," Kitty nods. "And yet I had the pleasure of torturing little Natalie Stars into silence?"

A wave of nausea rushs through me and I swallow the bile that rises in my throat.

"Is she dead?" Peeta asks, his voice hard.

Kitty studies him for a moment before sighing and answering, "Sadly, no, she's not."

"Why didn't you just kill her?" I ask.

"Because that would have been too easy," Kitty states as if it's obvious. "Natalie should have known not to demand things of my grandfather. He answers to no-one apart from myself, my mother and himself. Mostly himself. But if I want something, most of the time he gets it for me."

"Like what?" Peeta questions, eyeing her warily.

"Money, clothes, items of vaule." A pause. "Victors."

The naseua hits me full whack this time and I have to pace myself to stop myself from throwing up. Maybe I shouldn't have eaten so much. Regardless, Kitty continues.

"Most of the time it's Finnick Odair," she explains. "He is the most popular after all."

"You disgust me," I hiss at her.

Kitty only laughs. "Oh Katniss. Katniss, Katniss, Katniss. Sweet, innocent, _pure_, Katniss Everdeen," she teases. "Of course I digust you. I'm sure the whole Capitol does too, yes?"

I don't answer her, I just give her a hard stare.

"And yet we're so alike," Kitty mused.

"We're nothing alike!" I snap at her.

"But we _are!_ Don't you see?" She grins. "My name's Kitty. And yours is . . ?"

"Katniss," I frown, not seeing her point.

"No, what is it your friend calls you? _Catnip?_"

Gale. She's talking about Gale. Did President Snow tell her about him?

"We can be Cats together," Kitty grins, an evil glint shining in her eyes.

"We're still nothing alike," I spit. "A name's just a name."

Kitty taps her chin. "Yes, that's true," she says. "But that's not all."

"Oh?" I ask.

"Yes," Kitty smiles.

"How else then?" I demand to know.

"We both have an obvious attraction to your husband to be," she grins.

The cold rush of blood that I had been waiting for hits me like a ton of bricks. I waver on my feet for a moment before steading myself when I feel Peeta weaken beside me, knowing I'll need to keep him reassured myself. "If you dare touch him!" I warn.

Kitty chuckles and falls backwards onto her plush bed. "But dear Katniss, I can do so if I wish to do so. Unless you want your family to suffer." She lifts her head to quirk an eyebrow at me. "Which I'm sure you don't."

"If you know that the star-crossed lovers is an act then how do you know I'm attracted to him?" I ask. I feel bad for saying something like that right in front of Peeta but Kitty is grating on my nerves.

Her head flops back down onto the bed and she sighs. "Finnick is a sex god. A sex symbol of the Capitol, of the victors if you will," she begins to explain. "But being a sex symbol and being beautiful are both completely different things."

"Your point being?" Peeta asks.

"Finnick was fine for a while. I mean, he enjoyed it as much as I did, but I want something more . . . _real._ Not sex symbol material. Someone who's beautiful," Kitty explains. "And whether you know it or not Miss. Everdeen, you'll soon realize you want it too."

"I'm not sure I'm following," I frown.

"Finnick is all muscles and perfection. Your husband to be there is blonde hair, eyelashes and the most goddamn gorgeous eyes I've ever seen before in my life. I mean, really? You'd think they were altered by our surgeons to be that blue!"

Peeta is holding my hand so tight now I feel like my blood supply is cutting off. I don't mind though. If it keeps him anchored, he can hold on as tight as he wants.

"I'm sorry Kitty, but we're on a schedule, what exactly is it you want?" I ask with faux politeness.

"Well Miss. Everdeen, you are on a schedule. You have to be back at the train in what," she glances at her watch, "five minutes?"

"Oh, well then, if that's all you need then I think we'll be going," I say, turning on my heel.

"Miss. Everdeen?" Kitty calls as I head to the door. I turn back round and glare at her. "What?"

"Mr. Mellark is staying here," she says.

A stab of pain shoots up my hand and I fear he might have accidently sprained it. "Over my dead body," I hiss at her.

"That could be arranged," Kitty says, staring at the ceiling. "But it'd be over little Primrose's dead body. Or what's your friend's name? Gale?"

My heartbeat accelerates and feels like it's going to explode. "But-but-I-" I can't form a coherant sentence and stumble over the words in a panic.

"Katniss, I'll be fine," Peeta says, slowly letting go off my hand.

"No," I reply, trying to hang on. "No, she can go find another victor to defile!"

"You know you don't mean that," Peeta says.

I look and him and swallow hard. "Yes, I do," I whisper. At the moment, I do mean it. She can go and find someone else as long as she doesn't touch Peeta in that way.

He sighs and takes my face in his hands. The shining azure orbs that are his eyes somehow bring me a bit of comfort. "No Katniss, you don't. Come on, I've done this twice before. I mean, how different can it be with her?" He chuckles nervously, probably trying to make himself feel better, and I bite back the tears I feel forming in my eyes.

"This isn't fair," I whisper.

"Nothing's been fair for seventy four years now Katniss," He replies, pulling me into a hug. I wrap my arms around him tight, as if maybe holding onto him would keep him from having to go to Kitty. My tears wet the lapel of his jacket but he doesn't seem to mind.

"Tick tock, tick tock," Kitty says from across the room. "I'm waiting!"

Peeta pulls away, despite my protests and brings my hand to the doorhandle. "Go Katniss, Effie will be waiting," he says.

"What will she think when I come out without you?" I whisper.

"Oh, I sorted that!" Kitty interuppts. "I told her he was going to teach me how to bake!"

"At midnight?" I frown.

"In your bedroom?" Peeta adds.

"Midnight: Only time I was free. Bedroom: There is a kitchen through that door there if you want to check," she says, poiting to the right. "And an en suite over there," pointing to the left.

I scowl at her but I doubt it looks in any way intimidating with the tears streaming down my face.

"Goodbye Miss. Everdeen. This will not be the last time we meet," Kitty grins, waving at me.

I have a childish urge to stick my tongue out at her but decide against it.

Turning back to Peeta I ruffle his hair with my hand and hug him one last time. "You be careful alright?" I say, my voice muffled due to my face being pressed into his chest. "Don't let her do anything your uncomfortable with."

"Thanks Katniss," he simply replies, not guaranteeing to heed my words at all.

I pull away and press a kiss to his cheek. "Come to my compartment when she lets you go if you need comfort, my door is always open," I whisper.

He nods in understandment and I turn the doorknob slowly, as if dragging out my exit. When it's finally opened fully I brace myself and leave the room.

Taking one last glance into the room, I shut the door.

Leaving my boy with the bread alone to fend off the kitty cat.

**A/N: You may think this chapter was unnessacery but it's important to the later plot :D**

**Those of you who are waiting for an update on**_** Chained Hearts**_**, I'm working on it but I'm suffering awful writers block. Just give me some time, kay? :D**


	6. The cards and the money

**A/N: So sorry for the long wait! I've been very busy lately! Sorry. Anyway, here it is! :D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Hunger Games or it's characters or plotlines.**

Chapter Six- The cards and the money

Life, it seems, has become a complicated routine that even I can't keep up with sometimes. Ever since I was eleven I have known how to comfort and protect those who I love dearly. Defending my family and making sure they're fed. Assuring the peacekeepers that my mother is just having a nap and not clincally ill. Walking Primrose to and from school because she's scared of the kids from the Orphanage teasing her again for her size and weight. I have never had a problem protecting my loved ones because that is what I have grown up with. What I have been doing as long as I can remember. It was something I had restricted to those who were within my family circle, with the acception of Gale and his family. I always had done. But now, I have widened that circle because, in the end, I'm not letting them break Peeta.

It has become a routine. A sick routine. A twisted routine. A routine I never thought I'd have to develop when I was hunting in the woods with Gale, listening to him rant and rave about how twenty three tributes always die just for one person to live in the lap of luxury for the rest of their lives.

Peeta gets bought for a night, he leaves, and I find myself staying up late waiting on him coming back. As soon as I hear footsteps along the hallway I throw the covers over my head and pretend I was asleep the entire time. I told him to come to me every single time he comes back because I know what it's like to say, 'I'm fine, really, nothing's wrong,' and be lying. I grew up using that excuse. Putting on the face to block out the rest of the world because you just can't bear for them to know the truth.

The ultimate poker face.

I'm used to routines, believe me I'am, but sometimes the routine becomes so repetitive that you just want to scream because your sick of doing this over and over and over again.

That's how I felt when Gale started changing.

We hadn't been back in District 12 long when Gale got whipped for poaching by Thread and I met Bonnie and Twill. My routine had been altered slightly to accomendate the change of scenery and environment, but I'd adjusted. I'm good at that. Peeta's adjusted too. He's been doing this for a few months now and I think he's getting used to it. Which makes me angry. No-one should ever have to get used to something as awful as this.

Bonnie and Twill's message still confuses me. District 13? The idea is ridiculous. A mockingjay's wing in the corner of a shot means nothing. Mockingjays are as common as rocks. Still, I couldn't help keeping an eye out for it when the next 13 broadcast was aired.

The wing was in the shot.

Gale's recovery has been long and hard but he's been visiting Mother regularly for herbal treatments for the scars on his back. I'm meeting him in the woods today to talk to him. I was thinking of maybe suggesting the idea of running away into the forest, like he suggested the morning of the reaping, and escape everything. I came to my senses though. There was no way we'd survive. Not only is their my family, there's also his family and I'd obviously have to take Peeta and Haymitch with me. They'd get tortured for information if we left them behind. No, they'd have to come. And that would just add to the strain.

No, we need to stick to the routine.

I don't go to our usual meeting spot, I go to the cabin by the lake that only my father and myself has ever been in. Gale will see my footprints in the snow and know to follow them. Plus, he's been here before, when I told him about the suspected uprisings the day he got whipped. Once inside the cabin, I attempt to light a fire (which isn't as easy as it seems) and wait. I haven't spoken to him properly since he was lying unconcious on our kitchen table and Peeta took over watching him for me. I was suprised at that really. I didn't think Peeta and Gale would get along. I don't know why though. There's still a niggling feeling that causes the thought of both them together in my mind to feel unnatural.

Gale finds me just as I get the fire started. He doesn't speak, he just sits down by the fire and stares at the flames. I find my own gaze sliding towards the burning embers too.

"How's your back?" I finally manage to ask, still staring at the fire, causing my eyes to water from the heat.

Gale doesn't look at me as he answers. "Alright."

Another silence falls between us and I can't help but feel awkward and uncomfortable. Something happened that day he kissed me in the woods that shattered any of the ease I had grown to have around him. I didn't need the confusion. I still don't really. All I seem to do nowadays is spend time with either Prim, Madge or Peeta. Sometimes in the hob. Not much though since I haven't been able to focus properly in my hunting with everything that's been happening lately. I'm working on fixing that though.

"Do you really love him?" Gale suddenly asks, snapping me out of my admiration of the way the flames flickered and licked at the space around it. When he says this though, my head shoots up to look at him. He's still not looking at me, still staring at the fire.

"What?" I frown.

"It's a simple question Katniss, do you love him?" he repeats, finally turning to look me in the eye. The sudden intense gaze makes me shift uncomfortably.

"Who?" I ask stupidly.

"You know who Katniss," Gale replies, his voice hard and slightly irritated. "Bread Boy."

"He has a name," I say. "Peeta. It's not that hard to say. Two syllables, Pee-ta. Plus, the bread puns get old after a while-"

"Katniss, your avoiding the question," Gale interuppts.

"You know it's an act Gale," I answer. "Why ask me that?"

"Because I see the way you look at him. You have a fercoity in your eyes that I can't seem to place. Your also always looking around yourself, as if someone is going to try and snatch him right off your arm," Gale elaborates. "You look like your trying to scare people off."

"No I don't!" I protest. I shouldn't have been so obvious. Well, I didn't know I was being obvious but I must have been. I can't help the look that overtakes my face when I think about anyone deciding they like the look of _my_ boy with the bread and wanting to take him from me for the night.

"Yes Katniss, you _do_," Gale says, nearly angrily. "What is it about him then? I bet it's because he can bake right? Starving half your life and now you get a change to get hitched to a bloody baker!"

"Gale, what is wrong with you?!" I snap in shock.

"Why can't you love me Katniss? What does he have that I don't?" He asks me, more softly than before.

"I love him as a friend Gale," I say, my voice shaking with anger. "Just like I love you as a friend but what you have to understand is that Peeta and I went through the Hunger Games together. _The Hunger Games_ Gale!"

"That changes nothing!" Gale protests. "Before the Games you barely even knew the kid! Probably seen him in passing sure but you've known me for years!"

"And that's why your my best friend!" I insist.

"Best friend," Gale scoffs. "I love you Catnip."

"Gale-"

"Why can't you give me a chance?"

"You know I can't. If we can keep the act up then we need to. A lot of lives are at risk. You don't even realize what's being scarificed to keep us all safe," I say.

"Secretly then?"

"NO!"

"Catnip, please I love you. I don't care about the stupid act or your stupid bread boy, please just give me a chance!" Gale pleads. His words make me angry. Really angry. Especially the fact that it's like talking to a brick wall with him somtimes. Doesn't he know the meaning of the word 'no'?

"Stupid bread boy?" I repeat. "_Stupid Bread boy?!_ How dare you!"

"What? It's not like he's doing anything helpful anyway. Your the one who took out the berries in the arena, your the one who's family's at stake," Gale replies.

"Anything_ helpful?_ You have no idea what he's doing to keep us all safe!" I snap.

"Bringing the Capitol down with baguettes and cupcakes?" Gale scoffs.

"No, actually, he's prosituting himself under the orders of Snow to keep our families, _including yours might I add,_ safe!" I blurt out.

As soon as the words leave my mouth I wish I could inhale them back in. The look Gale now gives me is that of shock and . . . disgust?

"Oh my god, bread boy's a _whore?!"_ He exclaims.

"What? No!" I snap. "He doesn't have a choice!"

Gale bursts out laughing. "Peeta Mellark is a hooker?" he laughs.

"Shut up! No he's not!" I yell. "He's protecting us all!"

"This is just too good!" Gale cackles, holding onto the fireplace to keep himself steady. "Oh my god!"

I find myself shaking with rage and my hand clenches into a fist by my side. I can't punch him, I wouldn't make a dent. Instead I find my palm flattening out and I lift my hand and slap him across the cheek, the crack of my hand making contact with his face echoing around the cabin.

"Don't you dare talk about him like that," I hiss. "He is protecting us all. He's being way more brave than you ever were! He was in love with me and, even when not being too fond of you in general, is doing this to protect you and me and our families. So don't you _dare_ sit there and laugh, as if your some big shot. When it comes down to the crunch, Peeta is be a _way_ better person than you'll ever be!"

"Katniss-" Gale begins.

"No Gale!" I yell. "Just, no!" I get up off the floor, gathering my bow and arrows with me and leave the cabin.

I run all the way home, through the snowy forest, under the fence and back up the road to the victor's village. I want to go to Peeta's house. Just to hug him, hold him, comfort him, shield him from those hurtful words Gale uttered. Words like_ whore_ or _hooker._ Oh my god, what if Gale tells people? He could get himself killed! This is all my fault.

I stumble up Peeta's lawn and knock on his door frantically. When there's no answer, I take out my spare key from the small piece of rope round my neck and use it to open the door. Peeta never minds. He gave me the key for a reason you know. His house is dark and empty. There's no sign of life, light or sound. He can't be . . . no, not right now! No! This isn't fair! I kick the side of his sofa and scream. Once I've calmed down and composed myself, I take a shaky breath and examine his home. I haven't been in here in a while. A _long_ while.

It hasn't changed that much apart from looking a bit more lived in. I bite back a sob as I see flour dusted over the kitchen counter. He must have been getting ready to bake something when he was called upon. A recipe book sits open on the counter as well, the page open at a recipe for cheese buns. Pen marks, alternatives and corrections are scrawled all over the page in various colours and sizes. A small heart is drew by the words, 'Cheese Buns,' and inside is written:

_Katniss's favourite._

I trace my fingertips over the heart, a sad smile tugging at my lips. He's so sweet. Like all the pastries he bakes. I ponder Gale's question, do I love Peeta? I certainly think of him than more than just a friend. But not in the way people seem to think. Or . . . is it?

Something suddenly catches my eye. Some pieces of multi coloured paper sticking out of the top of the cuterly drawers. I'm not one to be nosey around people's privite stuff but I somehow find myself opening up the drawer and pulling the paper out.

They're cards. Loads and loads of cards. In pink envelopes, some of them blue, some sealed closed with wax and others covered in small hearts. I pull the first one out of it's envelope and open it up. Inside it says:

_Hey Peetie, it's Janeen from the other night. Remember me? I remember you ;)_

_Anyway, I wanted to thank you for the other night, you were amazing and did great. Enclosed is $1000 extra for you services. _

_I will definetly be recommending you to my friends :)_

$1000 extra? What the heck? Is that pity money or something? I look into the envelope and realize the money is still in there, completely untouched. That's the Peeta I know, not needing anyone's guilt money. Plus, the money is filthy. From the Capitol. I know I wouldn't touch it.

I flick through all the cards, realizing some of them are worse than others. Like this one:

_Hiya! How's my golden boy? ;)_

_It's April, remember? Of course you do, everyone does. I just want to thank you for that mindblowing night of passion last night. I haven't forgotten a single detail of anything. Nails digging and scraping across skin, teeth nipping and sucking on anywhere available, me moaning your name. It was amazing, and I just want to assure you that I'll definetly be recommending you to my friends and requesting you again sometime in the future._

_P.S: Enclosed is $4000, don't spend it all on sweets._

I nearly ripped that one up in my hands because I was so mad. There is a kiss on the envelope, only visible due to some deep red lipstick showing the outline of the kisser's mouth, and I feel like I'm going to gag.

Once going through all the money in the envelopes, he's been given over $1,109,710. I'm not joking. I used all the math I remember from school to count every note and penny up. If they're trying to keep the star crossed lovers act up by making only a select few know about Peeta's situation but by all the thank you notes there's certainly a lot more than a select few. Or maybe that is what a select few is in the Capitol?

Underneath the pile of cards is a notepad. I put the envelopes down and pick the pad up. The pages are full of ideas and ways to spend the money, all written by Peeta. All of them are selfless acts. If I had all that money I'd probably spoil Prim or something.

A knock on the door pulls me out of my thoughts and I drop everything in a panic."Peeta's not home!" I stupidly call out. "Come back later!"

"Good thing I came to see you then isn't it!?" Haymitch gruffly calls from the door.

"How'd you know I was here?" I ask.

"Because I saw you run for the hills here!" Haymitch replies. I sigh and go and open the front door. Haymitch barges in with a bottle of liqour in his hand. "We have a problem here sweetheart!" he says.

"Can't be as bad as what's happening now," I grumble. I frown and my heart stops. "Can it?"

"Yes," Haymitch sighs.

"Why? What's happening?"

"Snow's breaking the star-crossed lovers up."

**A/N: Duh, duh, duh! Sorry again for the long wait!**

**Please R&R! :D**


	7. Thick rimmed chaos

**A/N: Sorry it took so long, here's chapter seven!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

Chapter Seven-Thick rimmed choas

I feel suddenly dizzy and I grip hold of the back of the sofa. "Why!?" I demand as the world spins out of control. Haymitch moves to stand beside me and places a hand on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry sweetheart," he says. The use of the nickname is not to irritate but is said with sympathy.

"Why?!" I repeat.

He sighs heavily beside me and drinks more from the bottle in his hands. "Tomorrow it'll be released that you cheated on Peeta with your cousin who turned out to not be your cousin: Gale. Peeta will then have to move to the Capitol for, 'a fresh and better way of life.'" He stops aburtly and I know he's not finished.

"Continue," I say stiffly.

"I don't want to."

"Continue Haymitch."

"OK, with the star crossed lovers broken there'll be no stopping turning him into another Finnick Odair," Haymitch explains.

"No!" I snap. "That can't happen!"

"But they're not going to do that," Haymitch continues, glaring at me for interuppting.

"They're not? What then?" I ask.

"He'll move to the Capitol, where he'll fall into the loving arms of . . . the president's granddaughter Kitty Snow who'll treat him, and I quote, 'The way he should be.'"

My stomach flips and bile rises in my throat. This isn't happening. I'm going to wake up soon. I'll wake up and I'll be asleep in that cabin in the forest and Gale won't be crazy and our families will be safe and most of all Peeta would be safe.

Not only am I going to look like a Seam Slut for 'cheating' on him, Peeta is going to be forced to move to the Capitol. Away from me. Away from me. Away from . . . me . . .

I vaguely hear Haymitch swear under his breath as my feet slip out from under me and I fall face first into the sofa cushions, collapsing unconcious.

~xXx~

_I'm running. Running as fast as my feet can go. I don't know where I'am, it's a white void. I can't see anything but white all around me. I don't even know where I'm going, the more I run, the closer I feel like I'm getting to my destination but there's still nothing. There's been nothing for ages now and I'm getting tired, but something is pushing me forward._

_"Katniss!" Peeta suddenly yells in the distance._

_"Peeta!" I call back. "I'm coming!"_

_I stop as he appears about ten metres away from me. He looks sad. Hurt registers in his eyes and nothing but grief appears on his face. I don't like it. I want to help, I need to help. "Katniss!" he yells again._

_"I'm right here!" I yell back. I frown as he doesn't respond and realize he doesn't see me. Why not? I'm like, right in front of him!_

_A woman suddenly walks out from behind him. Long white hair, pale porcelin skin . . . and when she turns round to face me . . . deep green eyes that stare into my soul in an unforgiving glare. Kitty Snow._

_"I'm sorry she cheated on you Peeta," she says, holding onto his arm and leaning into him. "But you have me now so everything will be fine." He turns his head and looks down at her and smiles softly._

_"I know," he answers. Kitty returns the smiles and hooks her fingernail under his chin and pulls him into her in a kiss. _

_"This is all your fault Katniss," President Snow's voice rings in my ear. "All your fault."_

_My voice pushes up my throat and I scream, nobody hearing me but myself. I'm suddenly falling. Falling and falling and falling. Down, down, down. Until everything goes black._

_"Your fault."_

~xXx~

I wake up with a jolt, my body coated in a cold sweat, as a key chinks in the lock of the front door. I'm lying on Peeta's sofa, my whole lower half covered in a blanket. I push myself up on the sofa so I'm sitting upright and watch as the door opens and light streams in. A figure comes in and switches the light on. I sigh as I realize it's Peeta. What time is it anyway? How long was I out?

I open my mouth to call his name but frown when he turns round. He looks the most put together coming from a 'cilent' than he has . . . ever really. Dressed in plain jeans and a t-shirt seeminly wrinkle free which is strange enough because they normally end up rumpled and wrinkly. His hair looks pretty neat too, a bit tousled from his nervous habit of running his hands through it. The thing that stopped me though is that one his face is a pair of thick rimmed black rectangular glasses.

"Katniss?" Peeta frowns when he sees me. "What are you doing here?"

"I came looking for you but you weren't here," I say, unable to take my eyes off the glasses.

"I was . . . on a job," Peeta answers, coming over to the sofa and kneeling behind it to be face to face with me.

"Should I assume . . . ?" I trail off, not knowing how to put it.

"Yeah," he sighs, "You should."

"I'm sorry," I say, my eyes still on the glasses. Is he going to bring them up or . . . ?

"Don't be," Peeta replies, cupping my cheek in his hand. "You say that every time and you don't need to be."

"I know," I sigh, leaning into his hand. "It's just hard not to."

Peeta smiles and stands up before heading over to the kitchen. "I was just about to start baking some cheese buns if you want to stick around for them to be-"

"What the hell's on your face!?" I blurt out. Peeta stops half way to the kitchen and slowly turns round.

"What?" he asks. I point to my eyes and then point to his. His eyes widen in horror and he slowly brings his hand up to touch his glasses. His eyes close and he exhales. "I forgot to take them off didn't I?"

"Unless you took them off and then put them back on . . . ?" I answer.

"Ha ha," Peeta replies drily.

"How long have you needed glasses?" I ask.

Peeta shrugs and puts his hands in his pockets. "Ever since I was a kid," he answers. "I just . . . didn't wear them as often."

"How did you last through the games without them?" I ask.

"Portia gave me contacts. That's how I've been lasting the last few weeks but . . . I kinda lost them," he admits. "They look stupid don't they?"

"No, no," I reply. "They're . . . cool."

"Cool?"

"Cool."

Peeta smiles and sits beside me on the sofa. I can't help examing his face closer. The glasses aren't stupid looking at all, they're kind of . . . cute. Especially on him. They frame his eyes perfectly and the black brings out the comforting bright blue of them. Deciding to forget about the glasses, I ask the hardest question I've been dreading to ask him.

"Do you know?" I ask quietly.

"About what?" Peeta asks.

"Tomorrow?" I ask.

Peeta sighs and wipes a strand of hair out of his eyes. "Yes."

"What are we going to do!?" I exclaim. "You can't go to the Capitol!"

"We can't let your family suffer," he replies. "I'm sure it'll be . . . OK . . . in the Capitol . . ."

"With _her_," I add grumpily. Peeta sighs heavily and wraps his arms around me. I rest my head on his chest and bask in his warmth, feeling the most comforted I have done in ages. I struggle to come up with something to say but realize I don't need to say anything. It's just nice being here with him.

I leave to go to the bathroom and sigh when I get lost. These houses are too damn big. I walk into the wrong room. It was my mistake but I immediately wish I hadn't. Because it's one of the rooms he keeps his art in. But these drawings and paintings are different.

They're tributes.

District 12 tributes from over the years in their moments of death. The first one I notice is of the first tweleve year old to ever get reaped, Ella Lallabell. I was only six when she was reaped but I remember her because she cried and hang onto her mother and had to be dragged onto the stage. She didn't even make it past the bloodbath, she got butchered by a career, knocked off her podium as soon as the gong went. But the way she's drawn here . . . she's beautiful. Sure, there's the gaping hole in her stomach, but her dark hair is elegantly strewn around her, bits lying around her face and curtaining the grass around her. Her grey eyes are locked open and glistening with tears but her mouth is parted in a small smile. She's happy, she's content.

Another one is of Xavier Morgan, a fifteen year old Merchant who was reaped the year you had to vote people into the Games; i.e: the first Quarter Quell. He made it quite far actually, got to the final ten, I think. I borrowed a book from the library once and there was a glossy photo of him on one of the pages, known as the first District 12 tribute to make it as far as the final ten. But on the third week in the arena, a terrified tribute from District 9 who was incompetant with a bow and arrow set shot him in the head by accident. The tribute boy panicked, wouldn't stop apologizing long after the cannon had went before pulling the arrow out of Xavier's head and fleeing. That boy won that year. In the painting, Xavier looks peaceful, a wave of blonde hair hanging over his left eye and a small trickle of blonde dripping down the side of his head. Just like in the book's photo.

The next one I examine is a charcoal sketch of Belle Red. Belle was also in a book I had read. _7o Victors for 70 years._ The book was published before the 71st Hunger Games and went through all the victors over the years. Belle Red was the one other victor for District 12 apart from Haymitch and now Peeta and I. Belle died shortly after her victory though: she overdosed herself. Some say it was an accident, most say it wasn't. The sketch is a perfectly captured moment of the moment she became victor. Her ally, a District 6 boy called Harry, commited suicide when they were the only two left. He grabbed a piece of posionous fruit off a tree and bit into it purposely, killing himself before Belle's eyes. The moment captured here is when the trumpets went off and Belle looked up from her position-kneeling beside Harry's body and crying-the sun shining in her eyes and glistening off her tears. She looked so hopeless, so full of sorrow, it makes your heart feel hollow.

The one propped against a wall at the back of the room makes my heart clench in particular. That's Wyvern Peters. He was reaped when I was tweleve. And he was Peeta's cousin. I remember the day very clearly because I was still stealing glances at the boy who threw me the bread in the rain, wondering whether to go up to him and say thank you or not. The reaction from all the Mellarks was inevitable. They were all devastated. The bakery was locked that night, they all went to Wyvern's house to sit in the shutted out house together. Anyway, what people didn't know about Wyvern wasn't revealed until he'd died. A career had stabbed him and an ally of his-a small, wispy girl from District 3-found him and held his hand as he died. And he made his last confession.

_I'am gay._

I remember the words catching me off guard as I watched. Gay? What? People in the Districts aren't_ gay._ It's a grey area, looked down on, disapproved of. I never had an opinion on the matter because I never really thought much on the topic. I thought no-one was gay in this day and age. It made Prim cry. She thought it was sad and tragic. Revealing his burden in his final moments.

I pick up the canvas and trace over the drawing of Wyvern, his eyes closed peacefully and his hand resting against his chest, where his District 3 ally left it. I remember watching him die. It happened when we were in school and saw it on the update at lunchtime. Peeta's big brother Rye came and collected him during the next class and I didn't see him from the rest of the week.

I feel a presence behind me and I spin round to see Peeta standing a metre behind me.

"Sorry, I shouldn't be in here, I got lost," I say quickly, putting the canvas down and making a move to leave the room. Peeta holds up a hand to tell me to stop and I do as I'm told, ready to get a tongue lashing for invading his privacy. Instead though he walks over to where I left the canvas and picks it up, examining it thoroughly.

"We all knew about his secret," he says quietly. "I mean, to us it wasn't a big deal. Well, when I say that, I mean to most of us it wasn't a big deal. My mother wasn't too fond of it." Pff, I wouldn't expect any less from his mother. "But there was nothing she could do about it so she learnt to live with it."

"I'm sorry," I whisper, my eyes locked sadly on the painting. "How long have you been drawing district 12 tributes?"

"Ever since I was a child," Peeta replies. "It was just a stick drawing when I was five years old and saw and understood my first ever dead tribute. Still, as the years went by I began to draw them more and more. I've wanted to give them to the families but never had the guts to."

"You should," I say, looking around the room. "They're beautiful, they'd appreicate them." Peeta puts the painting of Wyvern down and rubs the bridge of his nose.

"I don't know Katniss," he says. "It's a bit late now."

I sigh and shake my head. My thoughts suddenly drag back to the news headlines for tomorrow and tears well up in my eyes. Hold on . . . it won't work! Gale and I didn't have an affair so why would the news of an affair work out? It wouldn't because Gale and I would deny the whole thing. Well . . . I'd deny the whole thing. But . . . would Gale? What if he plays it up to get back at me?

The Capitol will hate me. Even though the capitol loves their victors, betrayal does not go down well with them. And they loved the star crossed lovers for pete's sake! I'm going to be known as Katniss Everdeen: The whore who cheated on Peeta Mellark. I bet that's what Snow wants. I'll be hated, and Peeta will be taken from me. How harder a punishment can there be?

I spend the night with Peeta-we both came to the conclusion that we should savour our last moments of peace toghther-and I barely get any sleep. I just stay snuggled in his embrace, staring mindlessly at the ceiling, wishing that I had just swallowed those berries and let Peeta win the Games like he deserved to.

I don't sleep at all, getting up at eight o'clock in the morning and padding downstairs to the kitchen and switching the t.v on. The victor's houses get Capitol newsfeeds and the eight o'clock news has just begun. The capitol presenter has luminous yellow hair and her smile is massive, pinching at her cheeks in an ugly fashion.

_"Yes, it's true, recent victor of the 74th Annual Hunger Games, Katniss Everdeen-one half of the star crossed lovers of District 12-has had an affair with her so called cousin Gale Hawthorne of her hometown District 12. Surveillance images have been unearthed of a kiss shared between the two traitors outside the fence surrounding the district. As well as breaking the laws of staying in the District at all times, Katniss has comitted adultery against second winner of the games, Peeta Mellark. Peeta's reaction to this is yet unknown but our hearts go out to him in this difficult time. We will inform you more of the situation as it develops."_

And there I'am, looking like the bad guy. That kiss Gale gave me behind the fence shown on national television for all of the Capitol to see. How could the news have gotten out so fast still baffles me but there's nothing I can do to prevent this from happening now.

All I can now do is wait for Peeta to summoned to the Capitol.

For good.

**A/N: I basically saw a photo of Josh Hutcherson wearing nerdy glasses and-after having a fangirl overload-just had to give Peeta a pair. Come on, Peeta in nerdy glasses? You love it even if you don't admit it!**

**Also, the rights to Wyvern Peters goes to my cousin. She'd entered him into an SYOT but the person writing it deleted their account so she entered him in another one and that one got deleted too so I wrote him into this as a salute to my cousin. Great imagination babe :)**

**Please R&R :D**


	8. Getting on the train

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry this is pretty short, but I promise the next one will be longer because I'm going to try a Peeta POV for when he's inside the Capitol with Kitty Snow.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

Chapter Eight- Getting on the train

When Haymitch visits us later that day I know what he's going to say to us. "Tomorrow," he simply states as he stands in the doorway before turning round and leaving. Peeta must leave tomorrow. We've only got today together before we're pulled apart for good. I haven't bothered trying to find Gale to tell him. There's no point. And after the way he behaved when we were in the cabin I honestly couldn't care less about what he thinks of this.

Peeta left immediately after Haymitch, telling me he'd be back soon. I'm momentarily hurt that he's leaving me on my own when our days are numbered but I tell myself that if he must be going somewhere important and within reason. He wouldn't leave me without a good reason to do so. So I sit on the bench on his front porch and wait.

A door slamming catches my attention and I turn to find Prim staring at me angrily across from our house. "You cheated on him?!" she yells at me. Her anger knocks me right over and I open my mouth to reply but my throat dries up and I can't. "What the hell is wrong with you Katniss?!" She bounds down the steps to our house and marches over to Peeta's porch."Why Katniss? Why?!"

"Prim . . . I didn't . . ." I trail off, suddenly realizing that I can't tell her the truth. I have to lie to my little sister too and make her think that I'm some monster.

"I thought you were a good person!" Prim screams. "I thought you loved him! You had more than enough Katniss Everdeen! More than enough but nooooo you had to go and take more!"

"I'm sorry Prim," I whisper.

"No, don't try and play sad, you're nothing but a selfish person!" She steps off the porch steps and turns back round to stare at me. "I used to look up to you Katniss, but now I can't even bear the sight of you." With that she marches off down the gravel path to town, not even looking back once.

I throw my head into my lap and sob. "I'm so sorry Prim," I weep. "I'm so, so sorry!"

Prim isn't the only one who gives me the cold treatment as the day wears on. I don't know how people who don't have a Capitol t.v found out about the 'affair' but they all know, and they all glare at me as I walk past. Their eyes all ask the same thing:

_How could you be so selfish? How could you ask for more when you had more than you deserved? How could you have hurt such a lovely, kind boy?_

The glares burn every part of me that they stare at and I find myself giving up and hiding in Peeta's house for the rest of the day. He baked me some cheese buns and we spent the rest of the evening eating and watching the Capitol updates that fill people with more and more lies.

"It's OK," Peeta whispered to me that night in bed. "We'll be OK."

I bury my face into his chest and bite back a sob. I can see right through his lies and knowing that he's doing it to soften my troubles makes it hurt even more and I find myself crying harder. All Peeta can do is hold me close and let me get it out because we are not, in any way, OK.

~xXx~

_The next day:_

"Don't go Peeta please!" I scream, clinging onto him as he leaves the house with his bags. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to cheat. He means nothing to me I swear. He means nothing to me!"

"Means nothing?" Peeta laughs gravely. "And yet you still climbed into bed with him?"

"I'm sorry, it was a moment of weakness!" I cry. "I love you more than anything!"

"Sure, whatever, Katniss," Peeta replies as we arrive at the train station. People stand by and watch the scepticale with increasing curiousity. "But I'm still going." I hang onto him tighter and plant my heels into the ground.

"No! You're not going! I won't let you go!" I yell. "Please, I love you, you can't go!" Peeta stops and I fall foward, banging into his chest. He wraps his arms around me and holds me tightly as I sob, clutching his shirt as hard as I can as if I keep hanging onto him then he won't have to leave me.

"I love you too Katniss," he says quietly. "But I can't stay here and play second best to someone I thought was your cousin." My throat begins to ache and I hold onto him tighter.

"Please," I plead. "Don't go." He pulls away from me and my arms instinctly go out to hold onto him tighter.

"I can't stay with you," Peeta says sadly. "Still know that I will always love you." I clench my fists by my side and impusly jump forward and kiss him. Not like the staged kisses infront of the cameras of the Capitol, this is just for us. Peeta kisses me back with just as much fevor as I intiated and I feel something burn low in my stomach, a fire I don't want quell but want to overtake and comsume me.

All too soon though it's gone though and he's pulling away, out of my arms, and stepping away from me. "Goodbye Katniss," he whispers, turning around and walking to the train.

"I love you, please Peeta, stay," I whimper. Peeta turns round and looks at me in the threshold of the train. Tears fill in his bright blue eyes and his grip on his bags tightens to the point that his knuckles turn white. It looks like it's taking every piece of strength his has to get onto the train and not stay here with me.

"Bye Katniss, I'll never forget you," he whispers, getting on the train as the door slides shut behind him.

Tears fall freely from my eyes and I let out a shuddering breath. Snow better be fucking pleased with this stupid circus show I put on for him. Begging ex pleading her lover to stay. It didn't take a lot to act that out though. A lot of me wanted him to stay. I don't want to be on my own. I can't cope on my own.

My knees weaken underneath me and I fall to the ground and bury my face into my lap, crying freely.

Everyone hates me. All of District 12. The Capitol. My friends. My mother. My sister . . .

And now I don't even have Peeta with me to hang onto.

**A/N: Once again, sorry it's short but I hope the new point of view in the next chapter will make up for it.**

**Please R&R! Thanks ^_^**


	9. Back to the Capitol

**A/N: I'm sorry this took so long! I've been busy with my other stories! ^_^**

**For those of you who are looking for an update for 'Chained Hearts' I've sort of hit a wall and am suffering with some writer's block but I promise I'll update as soon as I can :)**

**It's Peeta's POV! :D**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

Chapter Nine-Back to the Capitol

The Capitol is the last place I ever thought I'd end up at the end of this. The one week before the Games and the night concluding the victory tour was enough to last me a lifetime. But this . . . arrangement I have with Snow has dragged me here. When I was told I had to give myself to various members of the Capitol for a night or Katniss' family would be punished, my first worry was if I was going to pull it off right. I've never had a sexual exprience, even when I was pining after Katniss and hit puberty, so what would happen if I did something wrong? I obviously knew what went where but there was always a possiblity I'd do it wrong.

But I haven't . . . so far anyway . . . and Katniss' family have been safe. How should I know though that they're being kept safe now that I'm trapped in the Capitol, about to begin another star struck act with a completely different person? At least with Katniss I wasn't acting. I know she'll probably never feel the way I feel but the thought of never seeing her again and pretending that I love someone else is more painful than the nights with any of my clients so far.

I haven't seen nor heard of how or when I'm going to meet Kitty again once the train arrives in the Capitol but I can safely say I'm dreading it. She certainly left her stamp on my concious from the night I first met her. She has a . . . thing for seeing you unraveled, watching you fall to pieces in her hands, everything you are and everything you stand for melting away because you fear the things she can do. With a click of her fingers she could blow up District 12 just because there was pulp in her orange juice, she's that powerful.

The train arrived in the Capitol late at night. It's so dark that I can barely see a couple of steps ahead of myself once I get off onto the platform. I almost break my neck getting off but manage to catch myself before I do.

"Peeta!" Someone immediately shouts. I squint blindly to locate the source of the voice but only discover who it is when I'm battered with a sideways hug. The hugger's arms tighten around me and my bag drops out of my hands. I'm still not sure who it is until they release me and shine a torch in my eyes.

I should have known it would be Kitty Snow.

"I'm so sorry about Katniss!" she declares. "She's an idiot, I swear. A gigantic idiot." At first I wonder what she's playing at; she obviously knows it's all a joke, right? Something formulated from her grandfather's sick mind? There's a sudden blinding flash as she speaks and I realize what's going on. There's a herd of camera crew behind her. "It's all so sudden, I know, and grandfather says you can stay with us for as long as you need."

I inwardly sigh and plaster a fake smile on my face. "That's very kind Kitty," I say.

"Don't worry, we'll look after you," Kitty grins. Through the single stream of light pouring out of the torch, I can just about make out her face. Through the porcelin mask I can see a malicious gleam in her eyes. The words run deeper than the people behind her could ever understand. "Get outta here you vultures!" she yells at the camera crew as she grabs my arm and yanks me through.

There's a limo waiting outside and Kitty immediately climbs in. I stand on the curb for a moment, unsure about getting in as well, until she pokes her head and says, "You're better getting in now before they catch up with us. Never let the paparazzi get a hold of a victor. You'll be lucky to get out with any of your clothes left on." Her words seem valid enough so I get into the car and shut the door quickly. Kitty slides across the seat and kicks the driver's seat, the limo immediately taking off.

Kitty's media demeanour and privite demeanour are two completely different things. As soon as the car door shut she turned into the woman I remember from that night in her room. She has a lot in common with her grandfather. She leans back in her seat, not even bothering to belt herself in, and her face completely changes from a smiling, gushing teenager to an indifferent woman with a face that not a single emotion flicks across.

"You're a good actor," she says, snapping me out of my thoughts. I scoff in reponse; the comment is unexpected to say the least. I still don't want to answer though, why should I? It's very probably what she wants. "That's good. You're going to need that. I don't think it would go down well with the public if you looked like you wanted to bite the head off the President's granddaughter. I told my grandfather he needn't worry. I said, 'If this boy can hide the fact that the love of his life didn't feel the same way about him then I'm almost positive that he can act.'"

She's trying to get a rise out of me, I can tell. President Snow was the exact same when he came to my house telling me I had to sell myself or he'd hurt Katniss and her family. It seems to be a fascination with the Snow family to bring up the fact that Katniss doesn't, in fact, feel the same way about me than I do about her. Well the joke is on them. I have built a wall around my emotions ever since Katniss told me that it was an act because if I let it get to me then I'm not going to get far. I'd probably end up a patheic shell of a person. And, in the end, all I want is for Katniss to be happy and if that isn't with me then . . . then I have to learn to accept that.

"You're thinking about her right now," Kitty states. She doesn't even turn to look at me when she speaks, her eyes stay locked on a certain point in the distance, her face plain and giving nothing away. "I can tell. There probably isn't a single day when you don't think about her, is there?" I grit my teeth and try to stay as indifferent as she is. It's difficult, trying to pretend that her words don't sting, don't aggravate me, don't kill me inside. "I'll take that silence as a yes, shall I?"

I still don't answer. If there's one thing I don't have to hand over to the Capitol it's my voice. I can give them my body and my emotions but I will not let them take my voice. This decision seems to irritate Kitty though as she finally turns her head to glare at me.

"Being silent won't help you in any way you know. We have plenty of avoxes around here and a little birdie tells me you're quite good with words," Kitty says. "And I'm almost positive you're not shy. The Hunger Games obliterates shyness. Ask Johanna Mason. She claims it was all an act. She wasn't a meek mouse but believe me, she was. The Games got to her as it does everyone and she turned into a killing machine. It got to your _girl_ when District 1 killed that little girl from 11. Well, I don't know, maybe you are shy. I mean, you haven't killed anyone . . . on purpose."

A shiver runs down my spine as the image of Foxface's dead body flashes before my eyes, the berries clutched tightly in her hand and the juice smeared across her mouth. The other girl who started the campfire also comes to mind even though her death had nothing to do with me. I returned to her with the intent of checking if she was OK and letting her go if she was alive, to find her finishing off the job with a jagged rock because she was in so much pain. There was nothing I could do but sit by her as she died and comfort her. Something in me is kind of glad that they didn't show that on the highlights on the victory interview because it's not one of my proudest moments. I should have stopped her from doing that to herself but I didn't. I just stood by and watched her.

"But then you'd think that your arrangement with my grandfather would have boosted you up a bit," Kitty continues. "All gratitude cards go through me and some of them were . . . detailed to say the least. It seems you have managed to capture a phemoninal portion of the Capitol. Both female and male. The last time we've had such a reaction to a victor was when Mr. Odair won. Although the difference in that being that we had to wait for dear Finnick to be old enough before we could touch him whereas sixteen is old enough to do with as we please so the uproar was massive."

I met Finnick Odair during my third job. The cilent I was with-a handsy woman called April-took me to an apparent Capitol hotspot and we'd ran into him and his cilent for the night. Both girls were quite excited to have met more victors than they'd paid for and they seemed like they were very close to exploding.

"Of course there was demand for the famous Katniss Everdeen as well but we needed something greater to make her suffer. So we took you instead," Kitty explains. "You did have more popular a demand than dear Miss. Everdeen which we'd never anticipated. Of course you'll be off the market once our 'relationship' goes public but there will be the odd buyer who won't question the solidity of the partnership. Friends of my family and such."

I crinkle my nose in distaste to her words. Kitty rolls down her window and hangs her head out, her silver hair blowing behind her. "We're nearly there," she calls back to me. She falls back into her seat and sighs. "The paparazzi normally pan out once we get closer to the mansion. My grandfather can be very intimidating, even to the people of the Capitol."

I peer out her window and swallow hard as the car stops and Kitty presses a button on a speaker. She simply states, "It's me," and the gates open. As the limo drives through and the gates begin to close behind us I try not to look back and think of how it kind of symbolizes my freedom ending once and for all.

But then again, I think I lost my freedom long ago.

**A/N: So what do you think of the Peeta POV? Yes? No? Maybe?**

**Please R&R! :D**


	10. His eyes are dead

_**A/N: Sorry this took so long, I've been completely focused on my other two stories Rusted Gold and Fallen. You guys should check them out! :D**_

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**_

Chapter Ten

_**Katniss:**_

_**Couple of months later:**_

I watch with dead eyes as the smiling couple wave to the Capitol crowd on the T.V. President Snow stands beside them with a grin on his face that doesn't really reach his ears, a proud grandfather supporting his only grandchild's relationship. The next big celebrity couple. Anyone who's anyone knows about them. Even victors. Even victors that everyone hate.

Basically, me.

The white haired girl clings to her partner happily, her white teeth gleaming as she waves and blows kisses at the gushing citzens of the Capitol. The owner of the arm she clings too as a smile as well. A very realistic smile that would have anyone convinced that he's happy. But I'm no fool.

His eyes are dead.

I remember being the one who got to make those eyes light up. Make them gleam with joy just by being there with him. I used to be the cause. Now, I'am nothing.

"The Quell is in a couple of weeks," Prim says behind me. The stiffness in her tone makes my heart clench. She's happy for the man on the t.v. Happy that he has found someone more worthy of his love than myself. Because as far as anyone knows, I took his heart and torn it in two.

"I know." My voice is quiet and she scarely hears me.

"They're announcing what it is tomorrow," she says. My hands ball around the sofa chusions and I exhale.

"I know."

I hear her footfalls coming nearer, stopping just behind the sofa. "Are they making you go back to the Capitol?" she asks. I suck in a breath and let it out slowly before nodding. Of course they're making me go back. I'm not going to get off it that easy. They're going to make me mentor the District 12 tribute girl for the Quell. "Are they going to make you do it with him?"

"I don't know Prim." I try and keep the irritated snap out of my voice, very nearly failing miserably. Because I don't know. I don't know what they're going to make me do. Maybe they'll make me watch him enjoy his life with his new girlfriend. Or they'll force me to work with him as he pretends to hate me. It will hurt too much. I don't know if I could handle it.

We watch the t.v in silence as it does coverage of the Capitol Couple. Every word is like a punch to my gut and each photo is a knife in my heart. Primrose perches on the edge of the sofa, keeping a gap between us. The distance she has been keeping between us is becoming larger and larger. She hates me for what I have done. What President Snow has convinced the country I have done. What everyone believes I have done.

Gale was an ass. He played along. Pretended it was real. He told everyone who asked that we slept together. That I begged him to take me because my other half was being too uptight about it. It blew up in his face though:

Everyone hates him now as well.

"He looks so sad," Prim says quietly. A frown forms on my face and I glance at her out of the corner of my eye.

"What did you mean? He's got a new girlfriend. He doesn't have a reason to be upset," I reply.

Prim scoffs and shakes her head. "New girlfriend," she mutters under her breath. "At first the cluelessness was cute Katniss, not it's just being downright stupid." I whip my head round to gape at her. My little sister just insulted me. My sweet, caring, loving sister just insulted me out of anger for the sake of being spiteful.

"What?" I snap at her.

"He's obviously not happy," Prim says. "He's loved you since he was a kid. You hurt him. You broke his heart Katniss. Squashed it in the palm of your hand. Do you honestly think he could bounce back from that so fast?" I turn back to the t.v screen and watch him carefully, my eyes watering.

I know Prim. I know what you're talking about. I wish I could tell you that I know. I understand. But I can't tell you, because I have to keep you safe.

"It's obviously a publicity thing," she concludes, folding her arms. "They probably threatened to kill his family or something." My heart drops at the mention of threatening to kill anyone. How does she know that they do that? As if noticing my confusion, she explains. "Mom told me about how Haymitch's family was killed when he returned from the Hunger Games. Families don't just die. They must have killed them because he didn't do what they wanted . . . something big."

My sister is cleverer than I give her credit for. She's almost completely right. Apart from the fact that it's her and mom that's in trouble. Not his family. Then again, maybe they were threatened too. I don't know what President Snow said to him the day he told him he had to sell himself.

"I miss him," she whispers. I put my head in my hands and bite back a sob. I miss him too. I can't tell no one that though because they won't understand. They'll say it's my fault. For being so greedy. For not appreciating what I had. For being a whore.

I wish you were here Peeta. I miss you so much.

_**In the Capitol:**_

Kitty Snow sat in front of her grandfather. She picked at her nails indifferently, waiting for him to explain why he called on her. She wasn't in the mood for this. Peeta is being _way_ too difficult. If he knew what was good for him he'd do what he was told. She's being nice to him though and letting him away with it. Soon though, her patience may begin to wear thin.

Finally, he spoke.

"What do you intend to do with Mr. Mellark now that you have him?" he asks, his voice dull of emotion. He doesn't care what she does with the victor, he's asking because he wants to know what direction to head in to go in for the Quell.

"He's mine grandfather," Kitty says firmly. "You are not sending him into the Games. If Everdeen goes in then he'll volunteer, in the Capitol or not."

"I'm well aware," he replies. "But I'am prepared to rig the reaping for their mentor to be chosen. No volunteering for citizens of 12." Kitty nods and plucks the fabric of her silk nightgown.

"Makes enough sense," she says. "But there are other victors I don't want reaped either."

"Catelyn, if we're going to make this believable enough then there can't be any other acceptions."

"But-"

"Catelyn," President Snow warns. Kitty shuts her mouth and nods glumly. "Which means, to make it believeable enough, there has to be a varity between those close to the hearts of Capitol Citizens and those we want rid of."

"Example?"

"Beetee, for example. Too smart for his own good. If we don't do something about those smarts then it could intiate a rebellion. Electrofying a lake is one thing, solving secrets of the Capitol is another." President Snow rests his chin on his clasped hands as his granddaughter nods in agreement. "And, despite the city's disappointment, Finnick Odair shall go in too."

"No!" Kitty shouts. "Hell no! You're joking right? _Please_ tell me you're messing about!"

"He knows things," President Snow says. "Secrets . . . Things even you wouldn't want revealed to the public yourself. We might as well clean up the other problems we've been having with the victors while we're at it."

"But-but why Finnick?!" Kitty whines. Her indifferent composure always fails around her grandfather. He always manages to make her angry in one way or another. "You can't do this!"

"You've got Mr. Mellark now Catelyn. Don't get greedy."

Kitty glared at her grandfather and stood up angrily. "Fine, do what you want!"

President Snow sighs, irritated by Kitty's strop, before calling, "Mr. Mellark, if you're going to eavesdrop then you might as well come in." Kitty had sensed her partner's presence behind the door from the get-go. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end when she sat down and sent tingles down her spine. She knew her grandfather felt it too. He misses nothing.

The door cracks open and Peeta peers around it. His face is drawn, his eyes dead. The pain that he obviously feels makes Kitty smile. The hurt, the pain, the suffering . . . it's like a drug to her. Being away from his Katniss has made this boy like an never ending supply of that drug. Her own personal heroine.

"Assuming that you've overheard our conversation, then you'll know what we're doing for the Quarter Quell," President Snow says. "Breathe a word of the details to anyone then the consquences will be dire."

"I don't agree with your reaping choices grandfather." Kitty glares, her eyes hard and icy as ever. President Snow shows no fear towards those eyes as many others would do. He is not afraid of his granddaugther. President Snow and Kitty are an even match for each other.

Irritated, Kitty spins around on her heel and marches out of the room. "Come on Peeta, we're going to fuck," she growls, dragging the disoreinted blond after her. He'll try and discourage her from putting that wrench from 12 into the Quell, she could feel it.

In three, two, one:

"You can't put Katniss back in the Games Kitty."

There it is.

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head.

"I can do what I want," she says. Her rage bubbles up inside her and she digs her nails into his wrist. "_Whatever _I want. Katniss is going into the Games and you can't stop it." Once in her room, he wrenches his arm away from her. His disobiediance makes her grit her teeth.

"Please, you can't do this."

She grabs his arm again and pushes him into the door. "You _don't_ tell me what I can and can't do, do you hear me?" she hisses. "What I say goes. What my grandfather says goes. You need to either get that through your head or learn to keep your mouth shut."

Peeta isn't the sort of person to give in easily, Kitty soon discovered after ordering him to the Capitol. After silence the entire car ride there, the boy from 12 never shut up. He kept trying to trap her in corners with his words. He tried to trick her, trip her up, make her say something that gave him a glimmer of hope that he could return to Katniss.

It never worked. Kitty Snow was no idiot.

"If you want to keep that little girl and her darling mother alive then I'd suggest you shut your mouth and keep it that way." She pauses. "Or I might just have to rip your tongue out and make you my avox. How about that?"

His round blue eyes glare at her angrily but he keeps his lips pressed together.

"But knowing you that might not keep you quiet. Nothing as simple as that shall muffle the voice of Peeta Mellark, huh?!" Kitty snapped. "Maybe I'll sew your mouth shut as well. Then you won't be stupid enough as to tell _me_ what I can and can't do!"

"You are one disturbed human being," Peeta said quietly.

"Tell me something I don't know," Kitty hissed. "If you weren't so pretty then I'd already have had you shot for your idioticy, say it was an accident."

"People aren't stupid. They'd know what had happened. You underestimate the intelligence of this country."

Kitty growls and slaps him across the cheek. He doesn't show pain, he just stares back at her, hot tears curling in the corners of his eyes. Even though he tries to fight them back, a couple slip down his cheeks and dampen them. A malicious grin forms on her face, proud of how she caused those tears. He shows no pain on his face-the salt water clinging to his skin and the pink mark on his face the only indication she hit him at all-and he clenches his jaw, persuambly to keep his mouth shut.

Maybe he's finally realized no matter what he says, he's never going to win.

"Good boy, looks like you've finally gotten it through your head," Kitty grinned, cupping her hand over his slapped cheek, making him flinch. "Now come on, I'm angry. I need something to work it out on."

She walked to the end of her bed. "You never know." She looked over her shoulder at him. He stayed where he stood, his back pressed against the wall, his cheek glowing pink "I might just let you call me Katniss."

The boy glared, walking over to stand beside her and sighing in submission. "You'll never, ever amount to Katniss in any way," he muttered angrily.

"Well," Kitty purred, trailing her hand down his chest and pushing up on her toes so her face was level with his. "Very soon, even Katniss herself won't amount to anything. Once we make sure she dies in the Quell."

Because it was now an ambition of hers. Make sure Katniss Everdeen dies.

_**A/N: Please R&R :D**_


	11. AN

_**A/N: Hey guys it's cupcakesprinkles14 with a regretful yet hopeful message.**_

_**Sadly this story has gotten away from me. I've lost myself entirely and have no idea where to go from here. So instead, I'm going to delete it and start again with an entirely different plot. It will be Modern Day AU instead of set with the plotline of the Hunger Games Trilogy and I have a fare idea of where it's going to go. The idea shall be the same though.**_

_**I have written a summary for the new story, here it is:**_

_**A Never Ending Routine Called Love**_

_**Modern Day AU:**_

_**When Katniss Everdeen is sent to California to stay under the lawful eye of her Uncle Haymitch, she falls upon a mysterious blond man who lives in the apartment next to hers. With a banging headboard almost night, and different woman every morning, Katniss becomes wrapped up into a web of lies and disceet that could define her, or destroy her.**_

_**I hope I see some of my reviewers sticking around for the rewrite :)**_

_**Thank you for reading,**_

_**Yours Truely,**_

_**Cupcake.**_


	12. Adoption

_**A/N: Hey guys, so a lot of people have said to me that they didn't want this story deleted but it hasn't eased my writer's block at all. So, I'm putting this story up for adoption. If anyone's interested review or PM me :)**_

_**And please ease up on the hate. I'm sorry that I can't continue or that in one reviews case that the plot was 'as stupid as hell'. I know most of you have been nice and decent about your opinions but it seems some people just can't. **_

_**Again, if you're interested in taking up this story please let me know.**_

_**~Cupcake**_


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